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Guest teaching: "How to Read Your Own Mind," by Thanissaro Bhikkhu

theworsthorse — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 00:34:55 +0000

Thanissaro Bhikkhu is, as you might have guessed by his moniker, a Buddhist monk. But don’t let this serious-looking picture of him fool you; he’s lively, plain-speaking, and he has a great sense of humor. (Some of you may remember him as the contributor of a Worst Horse fave, “Bizarro Thai Ronald McDonald.”) Really, he’s just a no-nonsense heck of a guy who just also happens to be a truly great Dharma translator and teacher.

Born Geoffrey DeGraff and now known to many simply as “Than Geoff,” he was ordained in Thailand in 1976, and studied with Ajaan Fuang Jotiko, a teacher of the Thai Forest Tradition, until the latter’s death in 1986. In 1991, Than Geoff returned to the U.S. to help establish Metta Forest Monastery in the hills of northern San Diego County. He has translated several meditation guides from the Forest Tradition, and is the author of many books and articles available on accesstoinsight.org and dhammatalks.org, where MP3 files of his Dhamma talks are also available.

The Horse is so happy to present here to you, through Than Geoff’s generosity, a guest post of teachings by Than Geoff. So, with no further ado…

How to Read Your Own Mind
by Thanissaro Bhikkhu

Instructions in meditation technique tend to fall into two main types. The first type tells you what to do-how to think, to visualize, to breathe-to create a certain state in body and mind: a sense of spaciousness, compassion, or solid concentration. The second type tells you not to do anything at all. Simply be, accept, or watch what's already there.

The reason for these two types of approach is that the mind has two sorts of problems: those that go away only when you actively work them out, and those that go away when you simply watch them patiently. Anger, for instance, sometimes seems so clearly justified that it goes away only when you sit down and reason with yourself, probing for its underlying assumptions and analyzing them until you're willing to admit that they aren't worth all the fuss. Other times it just withers away under your steady gaze.

What this means in practice is that you can't expect a single meditation technique to do all your work for you. You need to master both approaches. Not only that, you need to gain a sense of which approach to apply to which problem, and how best to combine them. Gaining this knowledge, though, isn't drudgery. It's actually an adventure. You get to explore on your own, to experiment, to read the results, and learn from your mistakes. You learn how to read your own mind.

This is why the Buddha didn't simply teach meditation techniques. He also taught the skills you need to be a reliable mind-reader: how to understand the workings of the mind so that you'll know what to look for, and how to develop the personal qualities of truthfulness and patient equanimity you'll need so that you can trust yourself as an observer.

Only within that context did he teach meditation techniques, and even then he didn‘t spell everything out. He raised questions and suggested areas for experimentation. Instead of trying to spoon-feed you the answers, or forcing you into a straitjacket where you aren't allowed to think, he wanted the meditation to capture your imagination so that you'd develop your own discernment and gain your own insights. Only when you experiment to figure out what's working and what's not do you understand cause and effect. And only through understanding cause and effect can you eliminate the causes of suffering and stress, and foster the path to true Awakening.

It's like learning the guitar. Simply learning to play other people's songs is only part of what it takes to know the guitar. You also want to understand some music theory and get some practice in developing your ear as a listener. Then you can use the standard songs as a jumping-off point for your own experiments and improvisations. That's when you can really begin to know the guitar, and take full advantage of what it has to offer.

So if you want to explore what your mind has to offer, the best preparation is to review the Buddha's meditation instructions in three areas: understanding, attitude, and technique.

Understanding. To understand the workings of the mind, you have to understand karma, or action, for karma is what the mind is doing all the time. It's through reading the mind's actions that you can read the mind in the first place. The causes of suffering are a form of karma, and so is the path to suffering's end.

The two most important points in the Buddha's teaching on karma-the two that set it apart from every other version of karma taught in his time-are that karma is intention, and that present experience is shaped by two kinds of intentions: past and present. Past intentions that are ready to ripen establish the range of possibilities that you could experience right now. Your present intentions pick and choose from those possibilities to shape what you actually experience. Even the intention simply to be or to observe is still an intention, and so it's a form of karma shaping what you see.

As you meditate, these points alert you to the fact that some things you experience in the present come from past intentions, and some from present intentions; you have to be able to tell the difference between the two if you want to read the results of your present actions. Suppose, for instance, that when you're meditating a lustful thought resulting from past intentions arises in the mind. If you're not alert, you might think that the meditation is causing the lustful thought. In this way, you're going to misread the results of your present actions. A good rule of thumb is that a thought that simply pops into your head comes from past intentions. What you do with it constitutes your present intention. You have no control over past intentions-and there are bound to be some bad ones-but you can make a difference with your present intentions. You can treat the thought skillfully-in a way leading to harmless forms of happiness-or unskillfully. And regardless of what your past karma might be, it's always possible to choose a skillful intention in any given moment.

These points are so important that the Buddha identified the distinction between skillful and unskillful as one of his most basic teachings. Meditation is basically the effort to develop skillful intentions and abandon unskillful ones at all times.

This means that meditation isn't simply a matter of letting go. It involves both abandoning and developing, plus a third activity: comprehending what's skillful or unskillful at so that you can know what to do when. And it's through experimentation that you figure out which of these activities is appropriate at any given time.

Again, it's like learning how to play the guitar. You strum and listen; if you don't like what you hear, you strum something different, dropping some notes and adding others, until you hear what you like. You won't learn about the guitar from just strumming without listening, or listening without strumming. The same is true with the mind. You learn what causes suffering and what leads to its end by encouraging certain states in body and mind, and then reading what you've got. This is why doing and watching are both necessary in meditation, and have to work together to get results.

Attitude. Just as you need to train your ear to become a better judge of your playing, you need to develop trustworthy qualities of mind so that you can trust what you see as you read your mind. Otherwise, if you're not careful, meditation simply becomes one more of the mind's many means of avoidance. You may have a complicated family issue you've got to work through, but you convince yourself that if you simply sit with it, it'll go away on its own. Or you may have an embarrassing addiction that festers simply because you won't look at it, but you busy yourself with something else: visualizations, full-body breathing-anything but the problem at hand.

To avoid this problem, you need to develop two basic qualities: patient equanimity and honesty.

Before teaching breath meditation to his son, Rahula, the Buddha taught him a preliminary exercise in developing equanimity. Meditate, he said, so that your mind is like earth. Disgusting things get thrown on the earth, but the earth isn't horrified by them. When you make your mind like earth, neither agreeable nor disagreeable sensory impressions will take charge of it.

Now, the Buddha wasn't telling Rahula to become a passive clod of dirt. He was simply teaching him to be grounded, to develop his powers of endurance, so that when unpleasant things came up in his meditation-as they inevitably would-he wouldn't get blown away. When pleasant things came up, he wouldn't get engrossed in the pleasure. He'd be able to observe both pleasant and unpleasant events in his body and mind without jumping to hasty conclusions.

To develop honesty in meditation, the Buddha taught Rahula a further exercise. Look at the inconstancy of events in body and mind, he said, so that you don't develop a sense of "I am" around them. Here the Buddha was building on a lesson that he had taught Rahula when the latter was seven years old. Learn to look at your actions, he had said, before you do them, while you're doing them, and after they're done. If you see that you've acted unskillfully and caused harm, resolve not to repeat the mistake, then talk it over with someone you respect.

In these lessons, the Buddha was training Rahula to be honest with himself and with others. And the key to this honesty is to treat your actions as experiments. That way, if you see the results aren't good, you're free to change your ways.

This attitude is essential for developing honesty in your meditation as well. If you regard everything-good or bad-that arises in the meditation as a sign of the sort of person you are, it will be hard to observe anything honestly at all. If an unskillful intention arises, you're likely either to come down on yourself as a miserable meditator or to smother the intention under a cloak of denial. If a skillful intention arises, you're likely to become proud and complacent, reading it as a sign of your innate good nature. As a result, you never get to see if these intentions are actually as skillful as they seemed at first glance.

To avoid these pitfalls, you can learn to see events simply as events, and not as signs of the innate Buddha-ness or badness of who you are. Then you can observe these events honestly, to see where they come from and where they lead. When you combine this honesty with patient equanimity, you're in a good position to read your own mind.

Technique. The Buddha taught dozens of topics for meditation to deal with a wide variety of problems, but one topic, he said, was home base for his mind: the breath. This may have been because the breath is something you can simply watch or actively fashion. It's a topic that belongs to both types of meditation. You may sometimes need other topics to deal with specific problems-like anger, complacency, or lust-but the breath is so close to the mind that it's a good place to take your stance when you want to read what the mind needs. Often the breath itself can be used to get the mind back in shape.

The Buddha recommended sixteen steps in dealing with the breath. The first two involve straightforward instructions. The rest raise questions to be explored. In this way, the breath becomes a vehicle for exercising your ingenuity in solving the problems of the mind, and exercising your sensitivity in gauging the results.

To begin, simply notice when the breath is long and when it's short. In the remaining steps, though, you train yourself. In other words, you have to figure out for yourself how to do what the Buddha recommends. The first two trainings are to breathe in and out sensitive to the entire body, then to calm the effect that the breath has on the body. How do you do that? You experiment. What rhythm of breathing, what way of conceiving the breath calms its effect on the body? Try thinking of the breath not as the air coming in and out of the lungs but as the energy flow throughout the body that draws the air in and out. Where do you feel that energy flow? Think of it as flowing in and out the back of your neck, in your feet and hands, along the nerves and blood vessels, in your bones. Think of it coming in and out every pore of your skin. Where is it blocked? How do you dissolve the blockages? By breathing through them? Around them? Straight into them? See what works.

As you play around with the breath in this way, you'll make some mistakes-I've sometimes given myself headaches by forcing the breath too much-but with the right attitude the mistakes become lessons in learning how the impact of your perceptions shapes the way you breathe. You'll also catch yourself getting impatient or frustrated, but then you'll see that when you breathe through these emotions, they go away. You're beginning to see the impact of the breath on the mind.

The next step is to breathe in and out with a sense of refreshing fullness and a sense of ease. Here, too, you'll need to experiment both with the way you breathe and with the way you conceive of the breath. Notice how these feelings and conceptions have an impact on the mind, and how you can calm that impact so that the mind feels most at ease.

Then-when the breath is calm, and you've been refreshed by feelings of ease and stillness-you're ready to look at the mind itself. You don't leave the breath, though. You adjust your attention slightly so that you're watching the mind as it stays with the breath. Here the Buddha recommends three areas for experimentation: Notice how to gladden the mind when it needs gladdening, how to steady it when it needs steadying, and how to release it from its attachments and burdens when it's ready for release.

Sometimes the gladdening and steadying will require bringing in other topics for contemplation. For instance, to gladden the mind you can develop an attitude of infinite good will, or recollect the times in the past when you've been virtuous or generous. To steady the mind when it's been knocked over by lust, you can contemplate the unattractive side of the human body. To reestablish your focus when you're drowsy or complacent, you can contemplate death-realizing that death could come at any time, and you need to prepare your mind if you're going to face it with any finesse-can transfix your. At other times, you can gladden or steady the mind simply by the way you focus on the breath itself. For instance, breathing down into your hands and feet can really anchor the mind when its concentration has become shaky. When one spot in the body isn't enough to hold your interest, try focusing on the breath in two spots at once.

The important point is that you've now put yourself in a position where you can experiment with the mind and read the results of your experiments with greater and greater accuracy. You can try exploring these skills off the cushion as well: How do you gladden the mind when you're sick? How do you steady the mind when dealing with a difficult person?

As for releasing the mind from its burdens, you prepare for the ultimate freedom of nirvana first by releasing the mind from any awkwardness in its concentration. Once the mind has settled down, check to see if there are any ways you can refine the stillness. For instance, in the beginning stages of concentration you need to keep directing your thoughts to the breath, evaluating and adjusting it to make it more agreeable. But eventually the mind grows so still that evaluating the breath is no longer necessary. So you figure out how to make the mind one with the breath, and in that way you release the mind into a more intense and refreshing state of ease.

As you expand your skills in this way, the intentions that you've been using to shape your experience of body and mind become more and more transparent. At this point the Buddha suggests revisiting the theme of inconstancy, learning to look for it in the effects of every intention. You see that even the best states produced by skillful intentions-the most solid and refined states of concentration-waver and change. Realizing this induces a sense of disenchantment with and dispassion for all intentions. You see that the only way to get beyond this changeability is to allow all intentions to cease. You watch as everything is relinquished, including the path. What's left is unconditioned: the deathless. Your desire to explore the breath has taken you beyond desiring, beyond the breath, all the way to nirvana. When that happens, you know that you've read the mind rightly.

In the meantime, though, it's important to understand the general pattern of the practice. You watch to see where there's stress in the breath or the mind; you try a few experiments-playing with this, exploring that-to see what alleviates that stress; and then you watch again, to see what's worked and what hasn't. Then you experiment some more. You keep on playing, keep on exploring. But you're not just playing around. You're trying to find what's skillful and harmless; you're bringing qualities of honesty and patient equanimity to the task, so you learn as you play. You gain both the pleasure of making beguiling sounds with your guitar and-even when someday you put the guitar down-the satisfaction of having mastered a skill.

Absolute Grace

heartsdeesire — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 19:17:35 +0000

A new Abraham quotes yahoogroup has been started by a couple of mavericks.
(All Joe six packs can now take a drink.) :) If you would like to join their group
you can sign up at AbeHicksQuotes@yahoogroups.com

Apparently, the mavericks were not happy with the limits of the old group, so
they banned together to start a new one. I think I am quite liking this new one.
Now for all you Joe six packs that was two mavericks=two drinks. Ok, all political
humour aside, here is an Abraham Hicks quote. Sorry I don't have a date or
workshop reference, that's really the last thing on a maverick's mind. (That's 3
drinks - but who is counting!) If you don't know what the heck I'm talking about,
watch the SNL version of the Palin/Biden debate on the web.

Now without further adieu, finally, the Abraham quote:

"You are never, ever, ever alone. You are always embraced. You are
always understood. You are always adored. You are always cared for and
well-being is always pre-paved before you.

In other words, you do live in an environment of absolute grace. And
the more you practice thoughts of that and watch for evidence of that
and speak it, you beat the drum of it whenever you see it."

I love those words: absolute grace. I want to spend time being really mindful
today of just how much I/we live in a state of absolute grace. How much we
are cared for, how much well being is our natural state, how much this Universe
is rigged in our favor, how we live under the umbrella of a benevolent Universe.

Today the place I choose to embrace as my home is the state of Absolute Grace.
I walk in Absolute Grace and Absolute Grace walks with me.

Love, Bethie

Quotes, they are the legacies of the wise of the past ages!

novice101 — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 10:43:18 +0000

Quotations are best, they say wise things in the most minimal of words. We wished our parents were like them when we were young and now our children wish we are like them! Here are five quotes I would like to share:

Go slowly to the entertainments of thy friends, but quickly to their misfortunes. - Chilo

Now things are just the opposite, when it's entertainment we flock there in large numbers and at the quickest time. But it is in time of misfortunes that our friends need us most. So, this quote gives plenty of truth, it reminds us how to behave when our friends need us most. We must evaluate our values.

One measure of leadership is the caliber of people who choose to follow you. ~ Dennis Peer

This sure is a good way to measure one's contribution. Many a time, most of us over-estimate our own worth or contributions, this should serve as a good eye-opener. We can gauge our own legacies by the caliber of the people who follow us. A good measuring stick, indeed.

Television is the first truly democratic culture - the first culture available to everybody and entirely governed by what the people want. The most terrifying thing is what people do want. - Clive Barnes

Television has truly brought us plenty of benefits, it has brought information and knowledge to people around the world in the swiftest way possible. This has revolutionised the way people think and act without people actually aware of it. It has brought about plenty of good and also plenty of bad. The good is most people has more knowledge and the bad is most people can be manipulated very quickly and unconsciously by the 'master manipulators' for their selfish interests. This come about because as the quotes says ',,,The most terrifying thing is what most people do want'. Most people want to satisfy their desires now (the instant gratification syndrome), and this is fed and encouraged by the self-serving manipulators through their clever use of television. People are exploited without being fully aware of it.

If you don’t aspire to great things, you won’t attain small things. - Jewish Proverb

This has a ring of truth in it, like all quotations. If we don't stretch our limits, then there is very little chance of us attaining the little we have managed to achieve. In business organisations, those that don't set annual targets would find they are soon left by the wayside. Most young people seem to be very fearful of carrying targets in their jobs. This quote would give them a clearer understanding why targets are important.

Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful. - Samuel Johnson

We all have seen knowledgeable and intelligent people commit hideous crimes and stupendous financial frauds. This is clearly because these people possess vast knowledge but they lack the vital ingredient of integrity. As the song says, "Parents teach your children well", we should try to instill the right virtues and values into our children lest they use their knowledge unscrupulously.

Connect to the crap you feel too...

leonadawib — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 03:59:25 +0000

Today I feel really, really tired. Like someone unplugged me. I went back to bed after only an hour of being up for another nap. Even using my index finger to get the electric window in the car to close felt like a humongous effort. I feel tired in my body, behind my eyes and in my heart. Big sigh...

Then, a voice in my head started up saying:

"oh...well you can change how you feel just the way you tell everyone else too."

Now the trouble with these little voices (aka "the critics inside") is that they take a kernel of truth and make it seem like the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

The whole truth is that I feel tired and I can change my state but if I change my state without first checking in, connecting with how I am now then I am committing an act of violence against myself. I am denying my experience and invalidating my sense of it.

The first step in Transformational work is acknowledging what is.

This doesn't mean wallowing in it, making it all of me (or you), thinking that it will stay this way or that it's someone's fault.

Acknowledging What Is means just saying hello to your present moment experience. Describe how it feels without analysing it. It is a mindfulness practice.

"I'm physically and mentally tired. I feel apprehensive about going back to work tomorrow because I know there is a pile of problems to resolve and something in me is dreading that."

PRESS PAUSE. Take some time to really be with this information. Resonate it.

"Ahhh, tired and apprehensive...something there also has a sense of dread."

A BIG SIGH comes now as my body starts to feel heard. And it tells me a little more (and I also become my own most kind and caring listener as I have an inner conversation with myself).

"Yeah...it feels like a heavy stone sitting there, like a dead weight, around my solar plexus. Ohhh... a pile of stones actually. Ah-ah...it's that part of my job that I have a sense of dread about. That part where daily problems land on my desk. Yeah. Not the whole job."

A REALLY BIG SIGH and a more perspective. I say hello to that, letting that something know that I have heard it and somehow the weight lifts a little. Now that I know what it 'actually" is I can put it aside until tomorrow when I am at work. I let this part know that I will take care of it tomorrow; right time, right place. I ask it where it would like to go and it pops itself on my desk at work in my in-tray.

Then I repeat this process again - this is called Coming to a Clearer Space. I am still tired and I am no longer resisting it. It has a sweet acceptance now in my body. It has a different more gentle feel in there and I feel more ok with myself.

Now I can check in, more consciously, as to what would be my next best move. It is to go for a very gentle walk in the late afternoon sun. This will meet my need for exercise, fresh air, deep breathing and connecting to nature.

I could never have found this sweet spot except through connecting with how I really feel, even if how I feel feels like crap. Try it yourself -try embracing what it is...it might be fear, tiredness, anger, sadness, grief, anxiety. Whatever. Your secret joy and living energy is inside it not pushing it away.

If you are curious you can download a 9 minute guided Clearing a Space MP3 audio file you can use again and again by clicking here. It's only $2.99. Very affordable.

Technorati Tags: stress relief,tiredness,connecting to self,clearing a space,self-acceptance,Focusing,mindfulness,conscious livi

mindful multitasking

MindfulWriter — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 05:40:34 +0000

You can multitask mindfully. Notice when you are switching contexts. Notice when you are doing two or more tasks at the same time or toggling back and forth. Notice when your attention is fragmented or only at half-strength.

Mindfully evaluate your to-do list:
➢    What items do I need to do?
➢    What items do I want to do?
➢    Are any of these items here to distract me?
➢    Are any of these “shoulds”?
➢    What’s important to me?
➢    What can be done another day?
➢    What can I ask someone else to do?
➢    What doesn’t really have to be done at all?

Mindfulness: A real-world technique for living in the present moment

MindfulWriter — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 05:37:19 +0000

Mindfulness: A real-world technique for living in the present moment
"The Complete Idiot's Guide to Mindfulness" by Anne Ihnen, M.A., and Carolyn Flynn

Mindfulness is living in harmony with your life. I say this because we so often exist in a state of dissonance with our own thoughts. When there is turbulence in the economy or in our personal lives, we want to shut it out, push it away, think about it later, hope it will get better or go away. But this creates a cacophany in our inner landscape, because these voices want to be heard. Gradually, we all off all the unpleasant parts, and so we only live with a fraction of our awareness.
Mindfulness is a technique that uses a focus on the present moment.
The goal of mindfulness is mindfulness itself – not insight, not spiritual revelation, not even relaxation, even though those often result from the practice of mindfulness.
You can practice mindfulness even if you are not a meditator. This is the foundation of our book. We wanted to reach people who weren't meditator, per se, to introduce the benefits of mindfulness to a broader audience.

Effortful Living: Seth Godin on Effort and Luck

jgrefe — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 01:58:13 +0000

Seth Godin has written a nice piece on "effort" and "luck" entitled, "Is Effort a Myth?". In this article he opens up the popular misperception that a great life comes through luck and not effort. I think (and perhaps Godin would agree with me), that a great life can be built through an awareness of the "lucky" moments that support us coupled with mindful disciplined doses of effort. For Godin, the popular perception of success through luck is misleading us.

Godin writes, "And that's the key to the paradox of effort: While luck may be more appealing than effort, you don't get to choose luck. Effort, on the other hand, is totally available, all the time." In our daily lives we are perpetually lucky. You are here now reading this and lucky to be alive to be able to do so. You are being supported in countless ways throughout the day. Perhaps you are already aware of this or maybe you have forgotten it. Either way, luck abounds in our life, as we maneuver our way to work, back home, to the store and so on. Meanwhile, effort and effortful living, demand action and is not as easy as a reliance on "being lucky."

Effortful living is a choice and, as Godin says, "is totally available, all the time." There is a great difference between floating through your work day as a mere cog in the system, and owning up to doing what you need to do or doing what you would do through effort. Sometimes, "the path of most resistance," although the only path that will get us where we need to go, is pushed aside in favor of "taking it easy" or simply dooming our potential by "not caring."

Godin, in his article, has written a four point "Effort Diet", which I recommend you pay attention to and enact. He also encourages readers to make their own "diet." Transformation in one's life is possible through changing what one does, by developing new habits. Nonetheless, making the plan is one thing, but effortfully enacting it and living through it is immensely difficult. It is the "difficulty" of this purposeful and effortful way of living that make it worth so much more than aimlessly drifting through your day. However, as Godin writes, "This is a hard sell. Diet books that say, "eat less, exercise more," may work, but they don't sell many copies."

Here, are my four additions to Godin's "effort diet."

1. Learn a new word everyday for one month and use it in conversations or in your writings. See how the words that you use influence the way that you think about and experience the world.
2. Control your speech and your self-talk. Observe how caught up you are in how you imagine yourself to be.
3. Thank all of the objects and people that are in your life. Treat these objects and people with the utmost respect. If it wasn't for them, you wouldn't be who you are.
4. For one week, go to work in the frame of mind that what you do greatly impacts not only the organization, but your own ways of being in that organization. This may include working in a way that you haven't worked before.

On that note, I would like to share with you an aphorism by my friend and mentor, Dr. Corey Anton author of Selfhood and Authenticity:

"Worry About it After You've Started: So many people want to fix their lives but don't know where to start, so they don't."

Thank you for your attention.

Please feel free to add to this list or, as Godin suggests, make your own list and, more importantly, enact it, live it, be it.

If you liked this article, you may also be interested in:

Actualizing: A Constructive Living Approach
Constructive Living: Unpublished Texts Series #1
Constructive Living: Unpublished Texts Series #2
While the Coffee Brews: Five Morning Fragments
Living Constructively: Effort
Constructive Living as Lifehack Strategy
To Be That Self Which One Truly Is: Carl Rogers

Afternoon Sun, With Lizard

Rev. Ellen — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 21:50:33 +0000

You know, I think I have the best office in the whole church. Oh, there are no grand, sweeping views or bustling cityscapes to ponder, but there are some woods, a little fence, and the visitors.

Oh, I get lots of visitors! Not a single day goes by when one cardinal family or another doesn't visit me, usually greeting me from a nearby branch. There are a number of chickadees who have popped by several times, to tilt their heads at me, and watch me work. There are several birds I see often, but shamefully, cannot name. I will have to do my homework on those.

I particularly enjoy the visits from the lizards. They are anoles, mostly, I think (there is one in particular who perches on the fence and blows big, sexy-lizard throat bubbles). Sometimes I see the occasional skink...what else...skinking through the underbrush and the leaves. It's always a lucky day when I spot one of those--they are very shy. The squirrels come by, too, but they never stay. Far too busy gathering the pinecones and the nuts, and whatever else it is they're digging for.

This afternoon, as another week winds down, and I turn my energy to Sunday when we all gather together again, I am blessed by this little lizard on my fence, turning colors before my eyes, and basking in the October-tempered afternoon sun. It has been a busy and sometimes stressful week. But somehow, taking the time to watch the absurd throat acrobatics of this tiny creature, who cares not one whit for any of the things that have been worrying me, I am seized with the urge to burst into laughter at my own folly.

Instead, I thank the lizard, and I take the hint...and just spend the next several minutes breathing in the lengthening light.

This Side of Heaven

heartsdeesire — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 20:12:38 +0000

This side of heaven, where do you suppose this side of heaven is?

"It's not a place you can get to by a boat or a train. It's far, far away.
Behind the moon, beyond the rain."

So said the rubyslippered one just before she sung that unforgettable
song: Over the Rainbow.

Behind the moon, beyond the rain...is it really that far away? Or is
it found within each of us? Is it found in between the spaces of
judgment about ourselves? Is it found in opening to our innate
creativity? Is it where our dreams lie? Where imagination comes
alive. Is it in the little forgivenesses we give ourselves and others?
Is it in that moment we took to consciously take a breath? Is it now,
when I end this entry, step outside, look up, look around, point my
face to the sun, breathe in the beauty of autumn and stay there
for a good long time? Unencumbered. Free.

Love, Bethie

Innerlijke rust bij onrecht

chattim — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 16:59:09 +0000

Innerlijke rust is kunnen geven als men niets terug verwacht zonder eigen waardigheid achter zich te laten. De kracht hebben respect te geven als men het niet krijgt is als accepteren wat men niet veranderen kan en zich boven de situatie te stellen in een milde vorm van zichzelf. Men ontkracht hierdoor de bedoeling van egoïsme, arrogantie en onwetendheid van handelen. Enkel dan rust onrecht in een situatie die geen moraal of betekenis heeft. - Tim

Mindfulness and meditation

Phil — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 14:57:49 +0000

In my own reading I've been exploring the concept of mindfulness and its similarity to meditation, being present, etc. There are biblical corollaries that make this an important topic as so frequently we react to life rather than observe it without giving in to impulsive reactions. Mindfulness and meditation are different but may share some commonalities. For example, healthy biblical meditation includes focusing on the character of God, his word, his creation, etc. It includes being aware of these things rather than judging experience or anxiously running after a feeling. Mindfulness also includes this focus and being present. Consider the opening words in Erica Tan's recent essay,

According to Germer (2005, p. 7) in Mindfulness and psychotherapy, mindfulness is "the awareness of present experience with acceptance." Mindfulness is a skill that enables an individual to be aware of the present--feelings, thoughts, situation, other people., and so on--without being reactive.

She goes on to quote Germer again about the opposite of mindfulness,

To be mindful is to wake up, to recognize what is happening in the moment. We are rarely mindful. We are usually caught up in the distracting thoughts or in opinions about what is happening in the moment. (p. 4-5).

In this way, mindfulness is similar to meditation in that both are focused on "noticing" things with our reactivity. Meditation does assume or judge things from God's point of view in such a way that frees us from worry or fighting the situation. Both include an acceptance but meditation includes acceptance of God's point of view.

I think mindfulness research in psychology has exploded because of the propensity for us to be constantly and anxiously judging our worlds. We confirm our own fears about what is right, wrong, good, bad. It recognizes that there can be wise thinking about these things but much of our lives are reactive and anxiety based. So, we benefit from the reminder that acceptance of feelings, and experiences helps us to be aware of that there is a "bigger picture" as Tan reminds us. While some may think this acceptance makes us passive or allows us to become unwilling to do something about sinfulness, that is not the point of mindfulness or meditation and would be a mis-use of these tools.

Tan, E. (2008). Mindfulness in Sexual Identity Therapy. Journal of Psychology and Christianity, 27, 274-278.

Differences between individual and family therapy - to the therapist, anyway.

existere — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 13:59:21 +0000

Just had my first official review at Operation Fingerpaint. Don't think it could have gone better, really. When the first sentence out of your manager's mouth is that it is a joy to have you there, there's nowhere to go but up!

Let's see. She doesn't have a name yet. Let's call my manager Joy, shall we? So, after Joy said what a joy I was, she then went on to talk about how I bring a fabulous energy to the team, that I fit in so well, and that my clinical work is excellent.

This is a particular relief as she directly observed me with a client this week, so she's seen how I conduct myself with clients. Of course, every client is different and each relationship with me varies accordingly, but I often feel I present such a confident, capable air - and that people don't know how crap I am behind closed doors. Joy said she has no worries about my clinical work, and that she didn't even before the observation. She said she hasn't felt she has needed to offer me a high level of support, as I was (predictably) confident and capable.

I think that's part of the unique nature of family therapy. While most counselling/therapy takes place one-to-one, family therapy is a bit different. I didn't train specifically to be a family therapist, so apologies for any mistakes that follow!

Traditionally, family therapy would have the therapist in the room with the couple/family. Another therapist, or a panel of them, would sit behind a screen. They would observe how things were going and then ring into the session via telephone. The queer therapy service I worked for before had something similar, but with each session being broadcast via a camera. Utterly bizarre, I feel, although theorectically I guess I can see why it would be useful.

At Operation Fingerpaint, we also use co-counselling as a model. The difference is that both therapists are in the room with the family, and everyone works together collaboratively. Everything is transparent - if any person in the room wants to offer feedback or an opinion, that happens. This meshes much better with my own beliefs about when therapy is most effective - a lot of my beliefs centering around transparency when appropriate, authenticity, and building a strong relationship with the people who walk into the consulting room.

Co-working can be threatening to people who trained as a regular counsellor. This is because counselling always has an air of mysteriousness. People who aren't counsellors don't know what happens behind closed doors - and many clients don't know what happens in the therapist's mind/body during the session. In this way, counsellors are are brilliant or crap as anyone else in their work - except I would argue that the people who are crap are causing more harm than, say, a crap telemarketer.

Co-working means that suddenly you've got another person in the room with you - you both see exactly how the other person interacts with clients, you need to figure out a balance and rhythm for sharing the work, you'll both have different reactions to the people you work with. I'm beginning to get the hang of it, and also starting to appreciate the value in having another mind there to share the observing, thinking, acting. Still, it's a breath of fresh air to occasionally still do one-to-one stuff - but even that changes once you have met and have close relationships with everyone in the family.

It seems to add a different quality to the work, a better working knowledge of where that individual comes from, and a surer thoughtfulness when offering comments.

Joy said I am very much client-centred, and that's such an important part of my own processes as a counsellor in the room with people. While I've got all my handy theoretical backing and hypothesis, the person/people opposite me the whole of their lived experience - an incomparable thing, I think. I'm glad that even though I'm working in such a different way to what I've been used to, I'm still me.

Existere. A counsellor, but also human.

Reflection for October 10, 2008: What is Desire?

Benjamin — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 20:53:29 +0000

"To unify your life unify your desires.

To spiritualize your life, spiritualize your desires.

To spiritualize your desires, desire to be without desire."

--Thomas Merton (Thoughts in Solitude, p56)

……………..

"In the Jewish mystical discussion of Creation, the Creator's act of tzimtzum—making space in the All-God Presence for the existential possibility of Other—was followed by shevirat hakelim, or the shattering of the vessels (the big bang?). As the God-Will to create filled the space formed by the vacuum of stepping back, of tzimtzum, the resulting universe became a vessel that was capable solely of receiving but not of giving. And so it became filled with so much God-Light that it exploded, and in so doing became a vessel capable of receiving as well as yielding, of containing as well as pouring forth. It is in that universe that our world was conceived. A world of give and take, of inhaling and exhaling, of to and fro, of back and forth, a universe in which there could be dance, where life could be dynamic rather than static. In such a universe there is room for receiving only when there is also the capacity to give, of feeling loved only when there is also the capacity to love.

Shevirat hakelim is experienced by the average person at least some of the time. When you are the recipient of potent dosages of loving from someone and it is coming from a place of authenticity and altruism, you may experience an 'explosion,' a bursting-forth transformation in your heart that leaves in its wake amoebic stages of evolving love for the Other, the very beginnings of a wholesome partzuf (countenance) process."

- Gershon Winkler (The Place Where You Are Standing is Holy)

……..

Tat: But now tell me this; how are the castigations of darkness, which are twelve in number, driven out by ten forces? How does this come about, Trismegistus?

Hermes : The tent dwelling which we have left, is composed from the circle of the zodiac which, in turn, consists of twelve elements; one nature, but manifold of conception, in keeping with man's erring thoughts. Among these castigations, my son, there are some that act in combination. For instance, undue haste and thoughtlessness cannot be separated from anger. They cannot even be distinguished. That it is understandable and logical that they will disappear together when they are driven away by the ten forces. It is these ten forces, my son, that give birth to the Soul. Life and light are united. And so the number of unity is born out of the Spirit. Likewise, according to reason, the unity contains the number ten and the number ten again contains unity.

Tat: Father, I perceive both the entire All and myself in the Spirit-Soul.That is rebirth, my son – one cannot form any three dimensional concept of it. You know and experience it now thanks to this Discourse on Rebirth, which I have put in writing solely for your benefit, since we would not divulge all this to the multitude, but exclusively to those whom God has chosen.
…………

It's not just enough to change the players. We've gotta change the game.

--Barack Obama

………….

"Lord, those are Your best servants who wish to shape their life on Your answers rather than shape your answers on their wishes."

Amen

--St Augustine (Confessions 10, 26)

Stop the insanity!

divingfenix — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 14:17:45 +0000

Years ago there was a woman that was a fitness guru of sorts and she was always screaming, "Stop the insanity!" Do any of you remember?

We all could very well be saying the same thing to ourselves today. Our minds are 'digging our spiritual graves' and just like the saying goes...'An idle mind is the devil's playground'.

The number one question I get is, 'How do I stop the brain chatter?'. Ironically enough, our minds are idle AND they do not want to shut off at the same time! Envision a merry go round just...going around. Nobody is on it, it just is going on automatic. Our minds are idle in the fact that it is not thinking any NEW thoughts. We're just re-thinking all of the SAME negative thoughts.

Many of us have had histories where we were taught to think...well...negatively. We are ultimately victims raised by victims. Our parents did the best they could and if they didn't know how to do something, well you just were not going to learn it from them! How could they teach you something they themselves never learned?The majority of people nowadays are walking around with lobotomies! We have given them ourselves because of the conditioning our society has become accustomed to...addicted to. We are addicted to the chaos, the 'train wreck'. Now, think for a moment. In the past few days, have you really made any decisions? Or have you just been operating on autopilot, doing the same thing today that you did yesterday...that you will do tomorrow?

We are distracted by the media, as the number of our days become increasingly less and our souls become emptier. It has become a media-ocracy. More often than not, It seems like the lives of celebrities are more front-page newsworthy in our society than 'real' news. This is the very thing that is helping us into the spiritual unrest that is covering this great nation of ours. Today, I wanted to give you all some food for thought. I learned of a man named Timothy Leary and became interested in some of the things he had to say. This blog is all about discovering, and so I decided to add these here. I felt some connections in my mind that I hope you will too. Let's jump start those engines between our ears! I hope you do not judge him by his history but by his mind and the powerful words.

Timothy Leary: How to Operate Your Brain
(1 of 3)

There's a saying, 'If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything'. It's amazing how we've heard sayings like that and many others throughout our entire lives. The truth has been right under our noses the whole time. We are not encouraged to have individual thought. Keep watching...

Timothy Leary: How to Operate our Brain
(2 of 3)

We all see with our brains. If a blind man suddenly regained his sight and saw an apple, he would not know what he was looking at. He would have to retrain his brain to know what it is, an apple. He must retrain his brain to know what a shadow is and what the depth perception is in say, stepping off a curb. You see with your brain. What have you been looking at?

Timothy Leary: How to Operate our Brain
(3 of 3)

"5:30 am" by Jim Kenndey

awareself — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 23:05:38 +0000

gliding train moves through early morning night

i see ASK in the window

should i ?

Technorati Tags: life, writing, depression, poetry, anxiety, Health and wellness, vancouver

Practice Mindfulness

drtimothydukes — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 11:05:32 +0000

Today is a good day to practice mindfulness. So many fears and doubts are arising, on our collective horizon, that it may be difficult to establish those feelings of hope and possibility that often carry us through difficult times. The practice of mindfulness is the basis for managing unwanted and non-productive thoughts, feelings and beliefs. Goldstein reminds us: “Mindfulness is a quality of noticing, of being aware of what’s happening in the moment, not allowing the mind to be forgetful. . . [there is no]. . . other factor which [is] as powerful as mindfulness for the cultivation of wholesome states of mind and the diminishing of unwholesome ones. There is nothing special we have to do to eliminate unskillful states or make skillful ones happen, except to be aware of the moment. Awareness itself is the purifying force.” (Goldstein, 1976, p. 141)

Today is a good day to pay attention to what is working in your life. Marvel at the successes you have achieved. Sort through the challenges and find your accomplishments. Look to your relationships, your friends and family, expand you view over your lifetime and allow the feeling of your successes to emerge into consciousness, right now.

Goldstein, Joseph. (1976). The experience of insight:

A simple and direct guide to Buddhist meditation. Boulder, CO: Shambhala.

Plight or Flight

personalplight — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 04:39:24 +0000

To ensure that I make a habit of updating this regularly, I'll keep my posts short and sweet. Clean and concise. Daily and direct.

Today I took care of some things I had been putting off. I now have a family doctor down on Commercial Drive, and I will soon be getting my charts updated with a Vancouver-based opthamologist. Once that is complete, I'll be receiving an additional $300 from the government on top of the $600 I am getting now.

Amid the errand-running I had a full-on anxiety attack downtown. I seem to be experiencing these more and more as of late, and I am very reluctant to solve the problem with a pill. I am going to tough it out for now and use my program to help abate the onset of panic. I realize this is all a part of my recovery, as well as an inherited disorder. Aunt Diane tells me that it runs in the family.

I've been listening to Oprah's podcasts on itunes--particularly her "Soul Series". It's encouraging me to practice daily meditation/prayer in addition to all kinds of positive affirmation, mantras, and mindfulness. I am considering becoming vegan, so I've started by removing beef, pig, and lamb from my diet. We'll see how this goes.

I leave you with a quote

"Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned" -- Mark Twain

The email I sent to my vocal awareness classmates

Aphinya Deley — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 23:46:32 +0000

I received an email from Janis, a classmate from the vocal awareness workshop at Omega. First she shared one of her experience with her vocal awareness journey, and then she asked all of us if anyone had anything to share with our own journey.

I had an incredible experience this past weekend at Ellie’s passion branding workshop. I did only 2-3 minutes speech. It was short, but it was beautiful (to me), and the bottom was my email to Janis and the less of my classmates.

I have been standing in front of the mirrors many days and practice every step of the vocal awareness, and plus I stand in front of my computer to sing songs (Thanks for Anne’s suggestion)

Well, I have to say that personally I don’t really know how far the practice has been improving, until this particular trip.

I went to Ellie’s passion branding workshop in CA past weekend and one powerful practice that she assigned us to do was to ask for the forgiveness from our passion. When the workshop end that night, her husband, Charlie, told us that everyone who still have something unpleasant in their heart needed to release it out before they go to bed. And the only way to do it was to stand in front of the room and shared with the group. Many people were able do this practice very easily, and they shared such a wonderful message.

For me, first I felt the strong sense of participating, then when the time went by the negative inner voice worked it way to destroy my courage. My heart pounded so hard, and the nervousness was getting very intense every time when the new person took a stage. Finally, I heard my positive inner voice said “Take your right step now”, then I stood up, took my slow silent loving breath, and walked consciously to the front of the room.

This moment was a wonderful moment. I was there, focus and so center. I looked at people from the inside out, I felt my breath, and I spoke nervously and consciously words by words. I felt the energy in the room; I felt the energy in my words.

After my speech, I got so many wonderful compliments from so many people. I was surprise that I wasn’t surprise why these individual shared their love and support. I knew that I talked to them in an energy level, and I was with them. Also, I felt so grateful when Ellie and Charlie said that I gave a powerful speech, and they couldn’t resist tear. I humbly told Ellie that I am where I am today because of Arthur. He guided and showed me the path. She smiled and we both understand in the energy level of the respect we both have for Arthur, and how wonderful he is.

Well team, you can tell that I probably will not stop my practice anytime soon. I am also sending out my support to all of you to keep up with your practice.

Anne and I are strong in supporting each other practice, and we open everyone to be a part of our support group if you want to.

I miss all of you.

From my heart to yours, take great care of your destiny, and I will deliver our 1 year reunion soon after I hear it from Arthur.

Wise Words For Today

Mick Turner — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 23:05:26 +0000

If we are to be praying Christians, we must be willing to approach God at all times in all ways. The intimacy of prayer doesn't become comfortable in once-a-week intervals or powerful in occasional bursts. It must be practiced time and time again - when we wake in the morning, when we work through the day, when we play or rest or eat or laugh or cry or watch TV or sit in a traffic jam.....we must train ourselves to acknowledge God's presence in the mundane moments of life. We must redirect our minds toward prayer at odd moments of the day - when we are cut off in traffic, when the secretary puts us on hold, when we're changing diapers, when we're playing taxi driver to get our kids to all their after-school obligations, when we're lying in bed almost ready to drop off to sleep. You see, God is our constant companion. It's time we had the nerve to stop ignoring him.

Mike Nappa

(from The Courage To Be Christian)

The Simple Truths of Service

keystoclaritycoach — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 21:55:08 +0000

We small business owners can learn so much from this sweet boy! Marketing doesn't need to complicated afterall! - and we can have a wonderful effect on the world around us - it doesn't take much. Just take a look at this short clip!

Coach Louise

The Simple Truths of Service

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A heart of flesh

Don — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 20:05:10 +0000

This quote came in SoJo Mail today. I like it and it's what animates my life. I cannot be still when I hear the forces of injustice railing against us. The us in U.S. is what I'm speaking of.

A new heart I will give you, and a new spirit I will put within you; and I will remove from your body the heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.

- Ezekiel 36:26