Tschuß!

Now I've mentioned before his slight confusion over his sexuality. I've known this for years, my mother knew even before I was born & honestly, it's never really been an issue. Until now. So, what I may not have mentioned is the fact he has a young man (22 years old) from the Philippines coming over to stay with him in November. My father's wife knows & is fine with it - as I would hope so since he will be staying in her house. In-fact, while we're on her, I may as well shock you all by saying again how she can email him but not me. Yes I know, shock horror.

So this guy is in the process of applying for a Visa to come here. Apparently all of his friends have been telling him not to come. My father could "murder him, traffic him, rape him, anything!". My dad tells me this as though it's blasphemy, to which I replied that those were the exact words he used when Bear & I were planning to meet for the first time.

Anyway, the point of this post? This evening, my father tells me the following:

[22:19:36] -----@btinternet.com says:
I got a really good deal on travel to London where we'll stay with Ian and Nick and it's only £14 train fare each way
[22:20:04] -----@btinternet.com says:
but I had to book right away and take the dates offered which are 7th to 15th November
[22:20:13] -----@btinternet.com says:
so I will miss your last week here

Well shit me a coconut, isn't that a fathers love in action right there.

Obviously he isn't bothered by the notion that I'll be living in America & won't be coming back any time soon. It's fucking unbelievable with these people I swear, they are so out of touch with reality & with me. I'm speechless, I mean, what the hell am I supposed to even say to this?

I mean he's going on about some Muslim guy in the fucking Philippines who's angling for a ticket & a job here so he doesn't get "stoned to death if his homosexuality is found out" - his words, not mine by the way so don't hold me to that. But really, is he coming over for a holiday or is my father fucking adopting him?!!

My father is supposed to be thousands in debt, cannot afford the airfare to come to my wedding & wants me to apologize to his wife because it causes him "undue stress". Well you know what, evidently he can pony up for this kid, fly him over & pay the bills while he's here, but can't even be there for me on my last week here, even when we had our own plans!

So fuck him. Fuck it. I'm done.

I wish I could have known you, been alive when you were alive, talked to you and maybe studied with you, heard your deep throated laugh in person and watched the skin wrinkle up around your eyes.

What does the time I live matter?  "Then" has past, is stagnant, unchangeable, it has happened.  But "now" is fluid with opportunities, developing, growing, alive. There is no "then." You exist only now, in the digitized recordings and printed words I read. Like art, alive through my experience of you.  If there is only now, what am I, this place I am, my features, style of existence, the dirt I walk on?  It is all built on then, everything now is made of every moment up until this moment -  the only real moment, now.

When I hear your voice, hear the chalk scraping on the chalk board, read your words, it all has a sense of dynamic aliveness. I feel parts of myself opening up, new paths appearing toward possibility.  You are now, a part of the dirt, and me.  I will know you when I truly know now.

Ramadan: Stop, Revive, Survive

Sheikh Bilal Dannoun explains many of the virtues of Ramadan as well as answering many common questions asked on the rules of fasting in the month of Ramadan Allah says in the Qur'an:'Oh you who believe Observing As-Saum (fasting) has been prescribed for you as it was prescribed for those before you, so that you may become Al-Muttaqun (the pious)'

• Download [64 MB]

All that said, I had an enjoyable time last night.  We ran into a number of people we knew, besides our high school friend, and had interesting, if voice-strained, conversations.  I used cotton balls to tone down the band's distortion and excess noise, even though I looked like a supreme dork doing so.  I was glad when another high school classmate told me she thought it was a good idea and she wished she'd had some.  I used the little notebook in my purse to write out what I wanted to say when I knew I wouldn't be heard over the din, so that worked.  I have to admit, I did smile and nod a few times when I couldn't hear a word someone said to me.  That's not a good strategy because I obviously had no idea what I was being agreeable about, but I didn't do it much and no one gave me any strange looks, so I'm pretty sure I didn't agree to something outrageous.

I was having such a good time that I didn't start to feel tired until about 12:30 a.m.  We arrived home just after 1 a.m. and I immediately went to bed.  Hubby and our friend stayed up talking until around 3:30 a.m.  Can you tell that my husband is a Night Owl?

My most common excuse for not taking time to train is "I have no choice - I just don't have time."

Let's face it, most of us have alot going on in our lives.  Most of us have work or school (or both work and school), personal relationships, family responsibilities, social circles, favorite TV programs, financial obligations, medical difficulties of our own or our loved ones, and a whole host of infrequent and often unplanned events and interruptions from speeding tickets to elections.

So it's not always easy to find time to train.  Sometimes, it seems darn near impossible.

Helpful(?) Advice

You may have heard alot of advice on this subject.  Things like: "Where there's a will, there's a way."  "Don't find time, make time."  "Make it a priority."  "Make a commitment."  "Just do it!"  But what does all this really mean, and how can it actually help me change the end result and get my butt moving?  All this talk about attitude and decisions and priorities sound great, but the things in my life that are taking my time now aren't just going to go away to make room for training - how do I deal with the physical reality of that?

Physical Changes Come from Mental and Emotional Commitment

There are physical limits to how much we can get done in a day - there's no way around it.  So to make time to train, we're probably either going to have to give up something else we're doing, or maybe (just maybe), "make" time by rearranging our schedules and taking a little less time on a few other things to make room.

But that physical change in our schedule probably isn't easy to do - if it was, we would have already done it.  So even if we do look strictly at the physical side of things, the mere physical possibility alone probably isn't going to help.  We're going to have to find the motivation to put our energy and time into making those changes.  For myself, that motivation is the key, so I've found it helps to look at my mental and emotional side first.

Choices

Ultimately, all of those helpful statements of advice we hear are talking about the choices we make.  And ultimately, each of us has to make a choice to train.  One of the most important things - maybe the single most important thing - I've learned from training with Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim is that I always have a choice.  I know, I hear you, sometimes we really don't have a choice!  It's true.  But I personally find that I also have a tendency to use that as an excuse to be lazy.  And I sometimes find that, in order to start making different choices, I need to recognize some of the choices I'm already making, without consciously recognizing them.

The truth is, any time we choose to do anything, it's rarely because we have absolutely no other choice - we do it, at that time, because we make a choice to do so.  There may be highly undesirable consequences if we don't do it, but we still do have a choice- those consequences help "motivate" us to choose one action over our other options.

So without going into any detail of what other things I plan to do, when I say "I don't have a choice," what I'm really saying is that I've already decided that all those other things are a higher priority than my training.  But is that really the decision I want to make?

What Do I Really Want?

I've faced all kinds of challenges to my training in the past 25 years including injuries, illness, personal relationship problems, rough travel schedule, car problems, money problems, moving my family to a new home, and deep questions about what I want to do with my life.  When I'm in the middle of one of these, or when, more likely, I'm in the middle of several of these at once, the pressures and my emotional involvement can make it pretty hard to breathe and sleep properly, let alone think straight and make good choices.  But every time I have a really hard time, and I ask Grandmaster Kim for advice about what I should do, instead of telling me what decisions to make, she always responds by asking me a question back: What do I want?  Not what are my obligations.  Not what am I capable of or what I think is possible.  Not what do I feel.  But what do I want?

And when I stop for a moment, and ignore all the competing priorities and commitments and emotions, and stop limiting my choices for just a minute, that question brings me back to basics.  Why do I want to train - what do I get out of it?  How do I feel about myself when I'm training?  What do I feel like I'm missing when I don't train?  For me, personally, when I ask what I really want, training - and the benefits I get from training, like physical fitness and lack of stress - are always at or near the top of my list.

Now if you feel like you don't know what you really want, it may be hard to find time to train.  But don't feel like you're alone - when I started training with Dr. Kim years ago, my life was in a total upheaval, and I had no idea what I really wanted.  But Grandmaster Kim helped me here, too.  One day during a special weekend training program, she recommended that if we don't know what we do want, then we should at least identify what we really don't want.  That one was really easy for me.  I don't want stress.  I don't want to be overweight and out of shape.  I don't want to sleep 9 hours a night and still feel tired all the time.  I don't want to be afraid to talk to new people.  I don't want to struggle to make ends meet every month.

So if you don't know what you really do want, then identify what you really don't want.  And then ask yourself if training will help get rid of the things you don't want?  If the answer is yes, then use what you don't want to help motivate you to train.  And as you begin to eliminate the things you don't want, you may just start to learn more about what you really do want.

Making Just a Little Time

I find that sometimes I get so caught up in all the business of my life, that I often forget to ask that question of what I want.  And when I do that, I end up setting my priorities and making my choices based on the circumstances around me or based on what other people want, not what I want.

But whenever I stop and remind myself of what I want, I inevitably find some things in my schedule that maybe aren't as important to me as I thought they were.  And in those rare times when I still feel like everything I have planned is too important to let go of, or when I'm still not sure what I really want, I still find a way to make a little time - even if it's only 15 or 20 minutes - to devote to training.

Recognize Your Choices

In a later post, I'll share some of the things I do to train when I'm really, really short on time - things like taking 5-10 minutes to stretch before going to bed, or going through my forms in my head while I'm driving or in a taxi on the way to the airport, or choosing to take the stairs up to the office instead of the elevator.  But for now, if you find you don't have time to train, or if you stopped training a while ago and can't find the time and motivation to get started again, I encourage you to do just 2 things:

• Identify all the other things that are taking your time and energy, and acknowledge that you're making a choice that these are more important than training.
• Ask yourself what you really want, or what you really don't want.

If you really do want to train, then these 2 things will help motivate you to start making choices about the physical changes you need to make to get you back where you want to be!

A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He decided to stop at the next city he came to, and park somewhere quiet so he could get an hour or two of sleep. As luck would have it, the quiet place he chose happened to be on one of the city's major jogging routes. No sooner had he settled back to snooze when there came a knocking on his window. He looked out and saw a jogger running in place.

"Yes?"

"Excuse me, sir," the jogger said, "do you have the time?"

The man looked at the car clock and answered, "8:15". The jogger said thanks and left. The man settled back again, and was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window and another jogger.

"Excuse me, sir, do you have the time?"

"8:25!"

The jogger said thanks and left. Now the man could see other joggers passing by and he knew it was only a matter of time before another one disturbed him. To avoid the problem, he got out a pen and paper and put a sign in his window saying, "I do not know the time!"

Once again he settled back to sleep. He was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window.

"Sir, sir? It's 8:45!"

More Funny Jokes

Love is when you want to make time stop and just keep the moment going forever...

Love is when you know you don't want him to go even a millimeter far from you, you want to keeo him close... but you have no choice...

Love is when you know what to do... let it be... and keep waiting...

Love is when tears fall down, not because of hurting... but because of accepting the truth that in this moment you can't do anything about it...

not yet in this time... but sure will be okay in the future.... i hope.... has to be...

... I reached the other end... the beginning was counting the days so that it will pass fast... I never realized that the other end will be totally the opposite of things... in this time, I want to hold on time as much as I want to... In this time, I dont want to see any calendar... and I am not checking on the time anymore...

I wish I can just make it like the stopwatch... just click one button and then it stops, then it can go again... and also, you can put it back to zero, so that it will start at the beginning, and you can start counting from the first second... and keep moments as much as you want to keep it...

Entourage

True Blood

Californication

Organization is a paramount to success, Subhana’Allah. Everyday, we benefit from having our personal lives and life in general organized.  Allah, subhana wa Ta’alaa has organized everything that He created so as to benefit us.  As He, azza wa jall, says in the Quran, (refer to how the planets follow there course) as proof of His perfect order and to the benefit of His, azza wa jall, keeping everything organized for our benefit.  Another practical aspect in our daily lives of the importance of organization is in our daily prayers.  We are required to pray at specific times and, as a result, we organize our lives around them, Subhana’Allah.  If our prayers were not organized, we would surely be at a great loss, Subhana’Allah.  So, being organized is a necessity of live.  Studies done on this subject have shown the more organized a person is, the more successful they are in their lives, whether it be their professionals or private life.  As Muslims, we know that success comes only by Allah, azza wa jall, and He is the best example of organization.

In this regard, we need to be organized n order to be successful in our home schooling efforts.  Time should be organized so it is not wasted, our learning environment should be organized so as to eliminate distractions, and our courses of study should be organized so that we are prepared in advance and our students know exactly what is going to be taught and it is taught in a sequential manner.  Being prepared is vital to learning because it utilizes a technique called scaffolding, which is a way in which students build on prior knowledge.  Therefore by being organized, we save time and energy which would otherwise be wasted by having to look for learning tools such as books, notebooks and pencils, and we give our students a stable learning environment which will help them to progress without hindrance, insha’Allah.   

So I got a few things out of the way yesterday. I finished my paperwork for Tuesday, did a PowerPoint presentation for my Tuesday afternoon class, burned my father two seasons of The Family that he requested, and burned my TA’s weekend movie requests. I also went to the salon and had some layers put into my shoulder length over processed lifeless bush of hair. However, after my hair was styled I had to come home and rewash it because my hairdresser put in some damn sticky styling goop that turned my hair into cement, helmet hair I am not. It was so bad I could not run my fingers through my hair without them getting stuck. Oh yes and I did my weeks laundry too, yeah me!

After I had run out of energy yesterday I sat back to watch a show I had downloaded from one of my favorite sites that I refuse to link in fear it will go away. The program Lost in Austen is exceptionally good with a great twist. It stars Jemima Rooper of Hex fame as Amanda Price an obsessive Pride and Prejudices reader who in an unusual twist (one you will have to see for yourself) is stuck in her favorite book and must keep it to form. In the meanwhile Elisabeth Bennet has taken over her life in modern day London leaving her in somewhat of a pickle. Do go looking for it or email me and I will tell you where to find it.

Well now all I have left to do is re-burn all of my school CDs, read three chapters in my Modern Drama text, go grocery shopping, iron a weeks’ worth of clothes, print out all of my students photos for my attendance board, and entertain my daughter who will be here at 12:10. Yeah so much for a relaxing on the weekend, these days my weekends are catch up for the rest of the week’s incomplete chores.

It's a matter of fact: People are usually poor listeners, even when they think they are the exact opposite. Often it's not even a matter of "not wanting to", it's just we're so busy rushing, taking care of the hundreds of things we need to get done everyday.

Here's the good news

Listening can be trained. Everyone can learn how to listen better and more actively. However, it's a matter of how important you really find it to learn it...

What are the benefits of REALLY listening?

By listening deeply and actively you can experience so many positive things, here are just a few ones:

• You can understand situations and people better
• You can enhance your relationship with people
• You can consistently lower the numbers of discussions and even fights
• You can start living a more balanced and even healthier life
• and much more!

How can we learn to listen?

In order to listen better and actively, we need to:

• be ready to put the other person first
• be ready to allocate enough quiet time for the talk
• be ready to dedicate our full attention to the person we are talking with
• be ready to put our own thoughts, prejudice, judgement aside
• be ready to grow - because this is one of the benefits I did not mention above :)

So, are you ready to listen?

Specifically, my girls are growing up. One is already eighteen. The other is fifteen. They are going to grow up, go to college (or not) and get out of my house. They are going to leave. It's going to happen. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

But with one only fifteen, that's at least three years and probably closer to seven years before they're both moved out. So why is it I keep thinking 'almost'? It's not like I'm just dying to get them out of the nest, although I am eager to have a little more personal freedom for things like traveling.

When I was a teenager, seven years was a looooooong time. Now, at 41, seven years is just not that far. I think there are two reasons. One, I'm not changing as fast. At fifteen, a single year was enough to make a full personality and body change. A seventeen year old is light-years away from a fifteen year old. A 43 year old isn't that different from a 41 year old. So the changes have slowed down. In seven years, I won't be a whole different person--just a somewhat different one, who has learned more, done more, and maybe had at least one love affair, Fate willing.

The other thing is mathematical. For a fifteen year old, seven years is nearly half her life. For me, it's only a seventh. So to her, seven years is what twenty years is to me--only even more so, because of the quickly-changing thing.

Remember that when you write, she said to hastily plug this into the writing blog. Your characters who are younger will find that a year is a long time, but the older ones won't.

Everyone is always speaking about the hurricanes and floods in the US, but this is the second summer where  Northern England, the west country, basically anyone living around the British Isles have lost their homes. Thousands are sleeping on the floor once again in local schools tonight because OF the damage the rain has done to their homes. No one talks about it though on CNN or Fox News, and yet the BBC has been talking endlessly about Gustav. Why is that?

Here are some photos taken of some local flooding earlier this year(I entered these in a certain competition, but I didn't win because the administrators wanted "prettier" photos to represent the British Spring/Summer, even though these pretty much summed up the summers of 2007-2008). Did I mention we didn't have much of a Spring either? Hey maybe if people stop driving their Hummers and SUVs in America and took climate change seriously, we can have a summer again.

2 Kings 25; 2 Chronicles 36; Jeremiah 40; Jeremiah 41; Revelation 12

Scripture that spoke to me:
2 Chronicles 36:15
The LORD, the God of their fathers, sent word to them through his messengers again and again, because he had pity on his people and on his dwelling place.

Observation:
Today's reading is the fall of Jerusalem. It seems like there have been books and books, if not many chapters, predicting and warning of this fall. God has sent word to His people time and time again, warning them to change their ways. But the people didn't listen.

Application:
Do we listen? Do we REALLY listen? I'd like to think I do, but I know that I probably barely hear anything the Lord wants me to. I don't spend enough time in prayer. I don't spend enough time in quiet. I need to be still and listen. Scott and I have a new plan this week to try to get up early and spend time in prayer, study, and exercise. I think I need divine help to make it work, or I'll fall back asleep for those extra 45 minutes.

Prayer:
Lord, speak to me. Let me hear what you have to say. Help me to be disciplined enough to make the extra time for You. Don't let me be lazy, for I want to have this time, but I know I am weak and will abandon this plan at the first sign of tiredness. I love You, Lord, and want to put You first in my life. Help my actions mirror my wishes for Your love and praise. Amen.

Why do it?

To feel better about putting something off we often think of other less important things we 'need'  to do instead.  So, try clearing everything else, from your mind and think exclusively and intensely for a few minutes about why you need to do it.  Concentrate on what you will get out of starting and finally completing the task. If you need to, write down a quick list which you only need to do for while as you get used to this exercise.

Break it down

See a job as too big and you will think of every reason to put off doing it. It's human nature and takes discipline to take on something big. Break it down into small chunks and it is much more manageable and your confidence will grow as you realise that each part can be done.

Spend 5 minutes

Whether it's  mowing the lawn, writing a report or going to the gym make up your mind to spend 5 minutes to just get started. So get your gym gear together and walk to the front door. Just observe how you feel when you have started. If it feels OK then go forward and get in the car or walk to the gym. Momentum is the name of the game, get started and then realise that it wasn't so bad after all.

Tell a friend

If there is a goal or task you have been planning to do then tell someone. Give them details and a time when you think you will have it done. You will give yourself an added incentive to follow through knowing that someone you respect knows you are going to do something by a certain time or date.

Drop it
If you just can't get started on something then a  great way to free yourself from the nagging guilt of putting the task off is to ask yourself what would you lose by dropping it from your list of things to do.

Again a do a brief list and be really honest. If the list is vague or has very little that inspires you then be disciplined enough to consciously shelve the idea or even drop it.  If it is important enough to you then It will, of course, re-emerge in your mind again with maybe stronger reasons for you to get started.

The aim of these steps are to help you to move away from the wasteful feelings of guilt and frustration which will take away your energy and enthusiasm in other areas of your life. Make sure you are clear about why you do or don't need to something and then take immediate action.

First, we examine what is S.M.A.R.T. and how it works. Advanced users may skip some paragraphs.

S.M.A.R.T.
S.M.A.R.T. (Self-Monitoring Analysis and Reporting Technology) is designed by IBM. It was created to monitor the disk status by using various methods and devices (sensors). A single ATA hard disk may have up to 30 such measured values, which are called attributes. Some of them directly or indirectly affect hard disk health status and others give statistical information.

Today all modern IDE/Serial ATA/SCSI hard disks have S.M.A.R.T. feature. It is not really a standard - so the meaning of the attributes may be different from manufacturer to manufacturer. In this article, we discuss ATA (IDE and Serial ATA) hard disks only. SCSI hard disks work differently: the failure predicition data is standard and there are strict rules about the sensors and algorythms. For example, the difference between real temperature and the result measured by the sensor should be less than +/- 3 Celsius degrees.

Many attributes are used by all manufacturers and they are used in the same (or near same) way. That's why for example it is possible to detect the temperature and the total power on time of many hard disks. Newer applications are able to detect, process and display these information.

According the S.M.A.R.T. specifications, when a problem is detected (failure predicted), the hard disk should work for at least 24 hours to perform the data backup. But in many cases this time is not enough - that's why it is important to recognize problems and prepare before it's too late.

Click here to see the full list of S.M.A.R.T. attributes (for example: reallocated sector count, off-line uncorrectable sectors count, etc.) and their meanings.

S.M.A.R.T. in action
The current status of the hard disk are constantly examined by many sensors. The measured values are then processed by some algorythms and the corresponding attributes are modified according the results.

A single S.M.A.R.T. attribute has the following fields:

Identifier (byte): the meaning of the attribute. Many attributes have standard meanings (for example, 5 = number of reallocated sectors, 194 = temperature, etc). Most applications provide name and textual description about the attributes.

Data (6 bytes): raw measured values are stored in this field, provided by a sensor or a counter. This data is then processed by an algorythm designed by the hard disk manufacturer. Sometimes different parts (for example, low, middle, high 16 bits) of this value contain different kind of information.

Threshold (byte): the (failure) limit value for the attribute.

Value (byte): the current relative "health" of the attribute. This number is calculated by the algorythm, using the raw data (see above). On a new hard disk, this number is high (a theoretical maximum, for example 100, 200 or 253) and it is decreasing during the lifetime of the disk.

Worst (byte): the worst (smallest) value ever found in the previous lifetime of the hard disk.

Status flags: indicate the main purpose of the attribute. An attribute can be for example critical (able to predict failure) or statistical one (does not directly affect condition).

Note: software may display more information based on these fields (for example, the status of an attribute, which can be "OK" or "Always OK" etc.) and may give help in evaluation or management of the attributes.

Attributes with their details

An attribute is correct, when the Value is greater than or equal with the Threshold. If this is not true for a critical attribute, failure is predicted, the hard disk is considered bad and it should be replaced immediately (the attribute determines the problem). Manufacturers/vendors replace the hard disk in the terms of warranty. The S.M.A.R.T. function in modern motherboard BIOSes warns the user at this point before booting the operating system. If the Threshold is 0 for any attribute, that attribute is not able to predict failure (because the Value cannot be less than 0).

Mathematically, one attribute is perfect if the following inequality is TRUE (you may skip this paragraph if you hate maths):

A - f(r) >= C (1)
Where:

A - theoretical maximum value, the "best" possible value for the attribute.

f - a function to calculate the decrement based on the raw (r) values. Usually it is a linear function, so in most cases r is multiplied by a B constant.

C - the vendor specific threshold level, under this level, the attribute is considered problematic.

This method has some disadvantages. The A, B, C, values (or the f function) are not defined exactly (these may vary from model to model even on two hard disks from the same manufacturer). Other disadvantage is that the attributes are evaluated independently, the relationship between them is ignored.

The problems with S.M.A.R.T.
The model described above has many weak points. Because of these problems, in most cases failure prediction is not working at all. The major problems are:

#1 Incorrect thresholds
Most problems with S.M.A.R.T. (lack of failure prediction) are caused by incorrectly selected Thresholds. Because of this, the hard disk attributes have no chance to reach the thresholds - usually they fail (become useless) before reaching this point. In such cases, S.M.A.R.T. really does not predict the failure.

In practical, we can find non realistic threshold values. For example, on most hard disks, many thousands of bad (not readable and writable) sectors required (according to the size of the spare area) before S.M.A.R.T. shows the problem. It does not seem to be a big problem because 1000 such bad sector takes "just" 512000 bytes of data (and this does not mean capacity loss because of using the spare area instead), but it may be important how these bad sectors born, where they are located on the surface and what is the bad sector increase rate.

In most cases, problems can be detected long time before an attribute value reaches its threshold. For example, a head problem which can make many thousands of sectors unusable (bad), can cause bigger parts of the disk surface unreadable - preventing the recovery of data from this disk area. Also analysing a such problematic area and saving the data to spare area may need lots of time (even hours), and it is possible that the operation is not completed without errors. During this process, the operating system usually stops responding, so a problematic hard disk may cause complete system instability.

Value=253, Threshold=63, on this disk 1900 bad sector is required to reach the threshold. Fortunately, on this disk, there are no such bad sectors

We can discuss about improperly selected threshold values also. Some hard disk manufacturers may define 60-70 years or even more for a hard disk total lifetime when the corresponding attribute is examined. It is really interesting - because manufacturers usually define the designed lifetime in 5 years in product manuals. Moreover, S.M.A.R.T. will not alert when the end of the lifetime is reached because this attribute is usually not a critical one.

The Value decreased to 97 from 100 after 759 days of usage. How much time we would need to reach the end of the vendor specific lifetime?

Moreover, the threshold value is 0 for many critical attributes. Because the Value cannot be decreased below 0, these attributes will never indicate any sign of failure - even if they "want" to do this. So S.M.A.R.T. will never alert.

Critical attributes and the threshold is 0

Sometimes very important attributes are not marked as "critical". It means that hard disk monitoring applications and the BIOS S.M.A.R.T. feature do not examine these attributes at all.

#2 Wrong evaluation method
Most applications use the vendor-specific method described above to calculate and display the health of the disk. The result is that most hard disks look much better than their real status. Hard disk manufacturers may choose thresholds or algorythms to show their hard disks better than an other hard disk from an other manufacturer also. This may mislead applications and users as well.

Software developers just use the manufacturer-dependent evaluation method and they do not do anything about detecting the real health status of the disks. Because of this, it is possible that the user use a hard disk monitoring application but the hard disk fail before showing any sign of problems or even a decrease in condition. Such applications may display 10-20 years or more as estimated remaining lifetime - which is at least questionable.

#3 Weight of attributes
Different attributes affect disk health differently. Some attributes (for example, 10 - spin retry count) are very critical. A small change in this attribute may indicate a serious problem, for example bad motor or bearing - but maybe a weak power supply can cause this problem also.

For such attributes, manufacturers often use a high threshold value, so they can be reached relatively easily. But because of the selection of the threshold and the f function described above in (1) inequality, some problems may be completely ignored. So users will not notice any changes of the critical attributes.

An other problem is that the relationship between the attributes is often ignored. It is possible that two or more attribute values almost reach their thresholds - but failure is not predicted because no value reached the threshold level.

#4 Lack of feedback
Without using a proper software which is able to read S.M.A.R.T. information, the user does not notice any problems with the hard disk, just when it's too late. If the number of bad sectors increase slowly (the hard disk founds some new problematic sectors and tests them and reallocates them), the user may not notice anything, especially if only the screensaver is running. But during re-allocation procedure, the operating system seems to be frozen (not responding) and users may reset or power off the computer at this time. Such power loss does not help the hard disk too much in the recovery process (it will be re-started at a later time).

#5 Temperature, sensor problems
Without using software, the user may not notice high hard disk temperature also. Both CPU and newer VGA cards have protection (emergency shutdown) against high temperatures but hard disks have no such protection. Even worse, hard disks are much more sensitive to high temperatures than any other component inside the computer case. That's why most manufacturers limit the maximum operating temperature in 50-55 Celsius degrees.

Most BIOSes have support to examine the power supply voltage, fan speeds, CPU temperature etc. But it is not possible to examine hard disk temperature from BIOS. The BIOS S.M.A.R.T. function does not alert if the hard disk temperature is too high. So it is possible that the hard disk is operating in a very hot environment.

But it is important to know that many hard disk temperature sensors are not too accurate (sometimes the difference between detected and real temperature can be 8-10 Celsius degrees or even more). It is recommended to use an external device (for example an infrared thermometer) to measure the hard disk temperature and configure the difference between the measured and displayed values (calibration). So the software then displays the correct (adjusted) temperature value (if this feature is supported).

It is also recommended to examine the temperature when the hard disk is idle and when it is operating for a longer time.

If the temperature is too high or too low (compared to the environment) when powering the computer, it is recommended to verify the accuracy of the temperature sensor

#6 Incorrect drivers
We may find many incorrect drivers for hard disk controllers. By using such drivers, one or more hard disks do not provide S.M.A.R.T. information connected to such controllers (or motherboards). This is usually independent from the used software because applications generally use the same method to access hard disk and detect information about it. It is possible that two hard disk provide 100% same information (usually the details of the first or PRIMARY MASTER hard disk). Software may filter this and display real (but partial) information but it is recommended to verify that the details are correct (for example, no hard disk serial number is displayed 2 or more times).

Usually, the drivers support only a limited range of hard disk commands. That's why some features do not work in all cases (for example, acoustic management), even if the disk supports it.

It is recommended to examine if manufacturer has updated, fixed driver packages or firmware updates. These may improve the situation. If a controller has RAID and non-RAID drivers, it is important to use the correct (non-RAID if no RAID array used) drivers. Using the other package may limit some features and usually temperature, health status of the disk(s) will not be displayed.

Many motherboards or hard disk controllers do not have 100% correct drivers for Vista. This can also prevent detection of detailed hard disk information and failure prediction under the new operating system.

#7 Incorrect hardware or incorrect data
This is the extension of the previous problem #6. Some hard disk controllers or motherboards do not provide S.M.A.R.T. threshold values at all - or all threshold values are 0. Hard disks connected to such controllers will not show any sign of failure because the attribute values are not able to decrease below 0. Applications may also show the hard disk condition "excellent" because the Values are far from the thresholds.

All thresholds are 0 - the "forever young and healthy" hard disk. Really?

It is also possible that the information provided by the hard disk controller is not complete. This does not affect the hard disk failure prediction status but some information detected and displayed may not be correct. Fortunately this does not affect the temperature and the hard disk health also. Newer applications verify the ATA signature and checksum values (described on page 116 of "AT Attachment - 8 ATA/ATAPI Command Set") and display a warning if these values are not correct.

Ideal case: the controller and driver provide correct and reliable information

Bad sectors?
Users often ask about what is a "bad sector", how they born and what they can do to fix these. Users are confused because verifying the disk surface with software (for example by using Windows Scandisk) does not report any problems or bad sectors.

S.M.A.R.T. is constantly analysing the disk surface during normal operations. If it finds a problematic area (one or more sectors where the data is hard to read or write), it tries to read the data and copy it to the spare area. The original location is then (internally) marked as bad and all further read/write operations pointing to the original location is then redirected to the spare area.

When the operation is completed, the original (bad) area is not accessible by software any more. Even re-install or many complete format operations will not show problems because the original bad area is not used any more. That's why software (for example Windows' Scandisk) will not found problematic sectors. Only the hardware security erase function will access this area (clearing these sectors also).

That's why for example DOS "format" command will never show bad sectors on most modern hard disks because of S.M.A.R.T. (except if the spare area is full but it is really hard to find a such hard disk).

Reallocation of the sectors may be completed with or without some errors (hard disks are working much better now compared to older models). But the reallocation procedure may cause system instability if it takes too much time.

The user should not notice anything about the steps described above - just when the number of bad sectors is high enough (the threshold is reached) and then S.M.A.R.T. predicts a possible failure.

Solution
A hard disk failure without any signs before the catastrophe is extremely rare, except if drive fall down, or if high power (bias) or natural disaster cause problem. But these situations cannot be predicted by S.M.A.R.T. of course. Usually some bad sectors born, their number is slowly increasing (maybe weeks can elapse without any sign of new problems). In other cases, high temperature and/or few but really critical problems can cause the death of a drive.

It is also very common that the combined effect of two or more attributes indicate different problems. For example, if the hard disk motor is not able spin up easily (it needs some retries) or the disk spins up too slowly, it may indicate a possible motor or bearing problem. Such problems have written traces in the corresponding S.M.A.R.T. attributes. So all (even very small) changes can be detected.

It is important to detect these signs long time before they can lead to failure. It is recommended to completely discard the whole model described above and ignore the incorrectly choosen (or missing) threshold values and evaluate only the raw measured data numbers, to detect the real amount of different problems about the hard disks. It is advisable to examine the connection between different attributes also. This way we'll have correct picture about the real status and we can prepare and even avoid data loss.

It is also recommended to select how we want to evaluate the hard disk status, depending on the real usage and "stress" of a hard disk. For example, in case of a server, notebook or a hard disk with critical information, the smallest problem can be dangerous, so any problem (even small one) should be noticed.

Some applications may offer such different evaluation methods for different uses of hard disks and they may give textual description about the current situation and tips to improve the condition. It is a nice function if the software can make passive alarms (send e-mail, play sound or shut down the computer) but it may be better if the application is able to actively prevent data loss, for example by performing an automatic backup operation if a new problem is found.

Hard Disk Sentinel application was developed considering these requirements. During the development, the S.M.A.R.T. information of many (failed, not working) hard disks were examined from many different manufacturers. The evaluation methods were designed based on the collected information. It is important to say that the "traditional" S.M.A.R.T. did not predicted failure for most of these hard disks.

Example
We received a not working hard disk for data recovery with the following S.M.A.R.T. attributes:

ID Attribute name Threshold Value Worst Data Status flags Critical?
1 Raw Read Error Rate 50 100 100 000000000000 000B Yes
2 Throughput Performance 50 100 100 000000000000 0005
3 Spin Up Time 1 100 100 0000000001E9 0027
4 Start/Stop Count 0 100 100 000000000A5A 0032
5 Reallocated Sectors Count 50 100 100 000000000015 0033 Yes
7 Seek Error Rate 50 100 100 000000000000 000B Yes
8 Seek Time Performance 50 100 100 000000000000 0005
9 Power-On Time Count 0 87 87 0000000014C1 0032
10 Spin Retry Count 30 152 100 000000000000 0033 Yes
12 Drive Power Cycle Count 0 100 100 0000000009EA 0032
192 Vendor-specific 0 100 100 000000000058 0032
193 Load/Unload Cycle Count 0 73 73 00000004218D 0032
194 HDD Temperature 0 100 100 003B00020024 0022
196 Reallocation Event Count 0 100 100 00000000000F 0032
197 Current Pending Sector Count 0 100 100 000000000004 0032
198 Off-Line Uncorrectable Sector Count 0 100 100 000000000000 0030
199 Ultra ATA CRC Error Count 0 200 200 000000000000 0032
220 Disk Shift 0 100 100 0000000000B3 0002
222 Loaded Hours 0 95 95 0000000007EA 0032
223 Load/Unload Retry Count 0 100 100 000000000000 0032
224 Load Friction 0 100 100 000000000000 0022
226 Load-in Time 0 100 100 00000000017F 0026
240 Head flying hours 1 100 100 000000000000 0001 Yes

The BIOS S.M.A.R.T. function did not show any problems. According to the table, the Values (100 and above) are very far from the corresponding Threshold limits. Most of them (Value = 100) are still on the theoretical maximum. If we would use the traditional evaluation method (by checking the values and thresholds), the hard disk condition seems to be perfect. Values under 100 are caused by the age and usage of the drive. But the total power on time of this hard disk is only 5313 (0x14C1) hours (the manufacturer defined he total lifetime correctly: the total lifetime is approximately 4.7 years, using the disk 24 hours every day (5313/0.13)/24/365 = 4.665 years). So the drive is not too old.

In contrast, if we use Hard Disk Sentinel and select the strict evaluation method (because this hard disk is a 2.5" one, used in a notebook), we will get a completely different result. During the evaluation, the software examines the important attributes (even if they are not marked as "critical" by the manufacturer).

The health of the hard disk (checking the Data field of attributes 5, 196 and 197):

100 x (100 - 10x6) x (100 - 30) x (100 - 4x4) = 23.52 %

According to this number, the health is disquieting. By default, this software would alert the user if the health value is as low as this number. By selecting the correct evaluation method and the correct alert levels, it is possible to predict failure long before the catastrophe. The owner of this hard disk could prevent data loss if he'd install this software before.

A low health value alone does not neccessary mean that the hard disk will surely die in the near future (to verify this, a complete (hardware) examination is required), but there is a real chance for failure. The problem of the hard disk described above can not be easily detected but as we can see, there were some signs in the S.M.A.R.T. attributes. Other hard disks with other problems may work for a long time, months or years (even if they have lower health value). Problems caused by a short period (for example, too hot environment or an incorrect power supply) will not disappear. But after fixing the reasons of such problems (using a heatsink, fan or replacing the power supply), the hard disk lifetime can be extended. Anyway, it is recommended to examine the status of these hard disks constantly or regulary and to use them as secondary data storage only. Users should make sure that their important and valuable files are stored on an other hard disk also (with a higher "health" value).

You may use, redistribute this article or any part of it if you add a link also to the original source.

www.hdsentinel.com - Back to Hard Disk Sentinel homepage

Bibliography
Information technology - AT Attachment 8 - ATA/ATAPI Command Set (ATA8-ACS) (Revision 3f December 11, 2006)
www.t13.org, D1699r3f-ATA8-ACS.pdf

Click here to see the full list of known S.M.A.R.T. attributes (for example: reallocated sector count, off-line uncorrectable sectors count, etc.) and their meanings.

I almost wasn't able to write "my boyf" because of that comment. And he thinks it should be in the "This is how funny my boyfriend is" category.

So I said it'd have to be a new category called: "This is how funny my boyfriend thinks he is."

His rejoinder? "Make a PMS blog that's just a litany of my failings. You'll only post to it for one week every month but it'll have like 50% more posts than the other blog."

Me: "Probably."

I would rather earn 1% off a 100 people's efforts than 100% of my own efforts. -John D. Rockefeller

There are two types of income:

1) Passive

2) Everything else

Passive income is simply income from a source that requires little to none of your time. Essentially, you earn passively.

Everyone has the same amount of hours in a day. So why do some people make thousands a day while most make $100? What are these people doing that you aren't? What is their secret?

Here's a clue: It has nothing to do with their job.

These people understand how to leverage time.

Let me ask you a question. How many full time jobs could you work at once? Maybe two? Combined equaling an 80 hour work week? Miserable but possible. If you made $45,000 at one job you now make $90,000 with both jobs but your most valuable resource- time is spent up. Money and time are never equal parts. This means that the more one works, the less their true monetary gain. Any overtime wages are eclipsed by opportunity cost.

Inability to grasp this concept destroys small businesses and franchisees all day long. Here's why:

Let's say you owned a Subway franchise and worked 30 hours a week overseeing the operations and employees. Just for the sake of the conversation, imagine you net $50,000 a year of personal income. Basically, you have created a job for yourself with a few additional entrepreneurial headaches. Let's also say that your first Subway location went so well that you opened a second one based on the business model of your first. At this point you would have 2 locations, work 60 hours, and make $100,000. You have now capped out. To even consistently work 60 hour weeks is brutal plus the responsibility of being a business owner places additional stress on you. The option of opening a third is not realistic because of the time, energy, stress, and other limitations.

Under that same scenario, Imagine if instead of collecting $50,000 a year, you spent $25,000 of your income on increasing the budget for quality labor which would reduce your net earning to $25,000. The difference is rather than overseeing the operation, you have a 2 hour meeting once a week with the general manager you gave the pay raise to.

You make only $25,000 a year, but you work 2 hours a week. Now your time is open. Imagine if you wanted to work 30 hours a week to keep yourself busy. In a perfect scenario you could open a total of 15 locations, and if each location paid you $25,000 a year you'd earn a personal income of $375,000 for the same 30 hour work week that paid you $50,000 before.

Even more, that same philosophy can be applied to hire another "senior manager" that oversees the managers of your 15 locations. You pay that senior manager $110,000 and pocket $265,000. Your new workweek reverts back to a meager 2 hours that you spend meeting with the senior manager.

This same idea can be applied universally.

In real estate people often buy homes to rent out. Many times I've seen people that make the stupid decision to buy a property that loses money counting on the property to appreciate over time. The problem is that like a job that bleeds your time away, a property with negative cashflow bleeds your monthly budget crippling your potential and growth. Let's say that after all your bills are paid you have $1000 leftover at the end of each month. You then buy a property and rent it out for $350 less than all your expenses associated with that property. With a $350 monthly negative cashflow how many similar properties can you afford to buy? One more? If you own two you will be in the hole faster than you can imagine once a repair is needed.

What if you bought a property, rented it out, and gained $350 a month positive cashflow? How many could you afford to buy? An infinite amount. This is the same idea as the Subway scenario, the only difference is the resource- time or money.

Once someone grasps this concept, the next step is choosing the right passive income investment vehicle. That itself is an art that must be based on these principles.

-- taylor swift

once upon a time i believed a beautiful lie

or maybe it was a version of truth diluted

but if you had beckoned i might have come

--

you made me remember my dreams

of chivalry and adventure and fair maidens

who could keep pace with knights of old

--

you danced in and out of my life light-footed

confident the way i always wanted to be

perfection in every twist, snap and spin

--

you wished for half-light in your hands

my half-life slowly decayed and died

with the remnants of trampled dreams

--

once upon a time i believed a beautiful lie

once between a life i penned a beautiful letdown

once beyond a love i found a beauty above you

I always find summer's demise a thought-provoking time.  I don't know, maybe it's the burnished glow that gilds her last days like mementos preserved in bronze.  Nostalgia takes hold--bittersweet, vague and nameless.  Have you tasted it, too?  Well, maybe it's just me ....

Summer's dying embers kindle an impulse to take stock.  Days grow shorter; they're slipping away.  Sand through an hourglass.  I miss them even before they run out, yearn to catch hold of them, but can't.  And what will I have to show for their passing, when they're past?