I about wanted to pass out this evening when reading Karen Russell's blog and saw a post about a relative of mine who just passed away last week, my cousin Valerie. I admit that I didn't know her that well. She was 13 years older than me and I only saw her and her daughter at family get-togethers at her grandmother's house-my great-aunt Elaine's cute little house in Baldwin Park. When I heard about her death this past week, I was shocked of course. She was way too young to die, but I am ashamed to admit that I didn't think too much of it except for the fact that I felt for her daughter Lindsey who is a teenager. I have to admit though that I thought how great it was that she is seeing her mom, dad, grandfather and Rebekah (I think that's how she spelled it?) again. And also our great-grandparents...Can't forget them! :) I am very thankful that I have a family who believes in the Lord and trains us up so that we know our inheritance. I know where she is, and one day I hope to meet her and connect with a cousin that I obviously had a common bond with. If by some weird chance one of my relatives happens to be reading this, please know that I'll be praying for Lindsey and the rest of you.

 What really shocked me though is that no one told me that I had a relative who owned a scrapbooking store!! (And they all know I scrapbook! I think?) And then I read Karen Russell's blog and other blogs of scrapbookers and saw how much she was loved and was a staple of the scrapbooking industry in her town. Even though it would have been pointless for me to know this since I lived in another state (California), it would have been cool to have been able to talk to a family member about my pages and get her advice, etc. I wish I would have known her, but I have to trust in the Lord on this one.

 I am still saddened though.

 For Lindsey. For her brother, her sister, her niece and nephew, her uncles, her aunts, her 91-year-old grandmother, and on and on.....

 I hope that she documented her history well for Lindsey.

 Isn't that why we all scrapbook? To let our families know us long after we are gone?

 Rest in peace, Valerie.

John

If your rear view mirror in stuck in the 80's and your feet are stuck in fluo disco dancefloors, it is time for you to listen to this! The future sound of the past as they call it.

Valerie Records is based in Nantes, (West Coast) France. They provide mother's milk to several musical projects such as College, Anoraak, Minitel Rose or the Outrunners... The common link between these musicians is to dig up the spirit from the best musical masterpieces from the 80's and to mix it it with groovy and catchy productions.

Not only the Valerie signature is getting bigger and bigger in France now that they also travel to Germany or UK to spread the word! This sound is maybe the answer to our past entry! Medias always starving for some news terrific quotes and comparisons are already talking about a new French Touch. Another one...

Check out it this College mix to have a better understanding of their music and universe. Make up your mind.

Isn't it funny how friends seem to come into and go out of your life.  How many of us are still BBF's with those of our childhood?

I have had many close friends throughout my life.  Most I swore I would have a close relationship with until I died.  Many I would have done anything for.  That it just the way I am...a loyal friend who seems to wear my heart of my sleeve most of the time.

That has gotten me into trouble on more than one occasion.  I have been devastated by so called BBF's over the years that got what they could from me and moved on.  I have come to realize my Grandfather's words were wise and true...your best friends in the world are your family.

I am lucky though, I do have a true friend since my days of living in Philadelphia.  My girlfriend Bonnie and I became fast friends when we met as co-workers at the Oxford 1st Corporation in Philadelphia.  Bonnie was a single mom living in the Olney section of Philly.  I lived in the Frankford section.  Anyone who knows Philly, knows these sections aren't exactly the clean and safe areas of the City of Brotherly Love.

I always admired Bonnie.  She was quick to be brutally honest and although this upset a lot of people, I appreciated her honesty with herself and those around her.  She loved me enough to tell me exactly how she felt even if it wasn't what I wanted to hear.

Bonnie was always there when I needed her.  If it was a ride to the doctors, a shoulder to cry on, or advice.  She hosted one heck of a Baby Shower for me when I was pregnant with Joey.  There seemed to be a 100 people there...friends and family...and I got everything (and I mean everything!) I needed for the baby.  She also drove me to the hospital when I went into labor.

After I moved from Philly, we kept in touch with each other by email, phone calls, and Christmas Cards.  The last time I actually got to see her was my wedding which was 14 years ago this October 8th.  Recently she drove all the way from Philadelphia with her new boyfriend Joe for a visit with me.

After 14 years, it was just like we never missed a beat.  I gave her a tour of my home and farm.  We hoped in the truck and I took her around the county.  We drove out to the Canyon and hiked in the woods.  We went out to Hills Creek also and stopped at little shops along the way.  We all went out for dinner at Harlands and came back for smores around the camp fire at our house.  We might not have seen each other for many years but we are still close friends.  We both have a lot more wrinkles, gray hair, and are carrying a few extra pounds but it seems just like yesterday when she was driving me to the hospital while I was in labor telling her "don't touch me, whatever you do, don't touch me".

So, Bonnie and Joe are back home.  Bonnie will always be a city girl and I doubt I will ever willingly live in the city again but we will always be friends no matter how often we see each other or how many miles are between us.  I also know that if I need her, she is only a phone call away and would be here as fast as her car will take her.

Many friends have come and gone in and out of my life since I met Bonnie way back in 1988 when I was just 18, single and pregnant, and scared of what the future held for me.  I am betting though she will be in my life until the day I die....good friends until the end.  And by the way, she picked a good man this time...both Vince and I like Joe a whole lot (and besides he shares his name with My Marine as well).

Seems like I make friends quickly with Philadelphia natives...my newest friend is Valerie who recently retired to Tioga County.  She stopped by to buy soap from me a year or so ago.  We quickly found we had a lot in common and have become buddies.  She always has a smile on her face and giggles like a school girl.  No matter what is going on in your life, just hearing that giggle cracks me up and makes me smile.

So, although Philadelphia taught me a lot, knocked me down a few times, and made me long for a small place in the country...it has given me true friends...old and new.

I love Futurecop!. These guys have been featured on a consistent basis on the Valerie group site, and their mixes typically feature a great selection of 1980s hits while touching on today as well. I posted a live set from their Australian tour earlier this summer, and although that tape is solid the following tapes are even more focused. Here is their newest tape the "Euro Mix," and their "We Are The Future Mix" that they released earlier this summer on their personal blog. Their idea is that music should be as much a free experience as possible, and they consistently have given away some awesome mixes... Here are the two newest Futurecop! mixes and their accompanying tracklists...

Euromix - Tracklist

01. Kryptonite Pussy- Yo Majesty
02. Big Dancing- Bounce Camp
03. MIA- Bucky Done Gun (Futurecop! Remix)
04. Girl and the Sea- The Presets (Cut Copy Remix)
05. Adeyhawke- Into Me
06. College- Teenage Colour (Maethelvin Remix)
07. Eyes Like The Ocean- Futurecop!
08. All Too Vivid (Original Mix)- Vega
09. Space Thieves- Futurecop!
10. Follow Me (BMX Remix)- Panther DLX

We Are The Future! Mix - Tracklist

01. Madonna – Borderline
02. Cameo – Word Up
03. Phil Collins – Sussudio
04. Belinda Carlisle - We Want The Same Thing
05. Janet Jackson – Principle Pleasure
06. Jermaine Stewart – We Don't Have To Take Clothes Off
07. Futurecop! – Tonight's Hero
08. Eric Carmen - Hungry Eyes
09. Bruce Hornsby – The Long Race
10. Kenny Loggins – St Elmo's Fire
11. Robert Tepper – No Easy Way Out
12. Simple Minds – Don't you (Forget About Me)
13. Futurecop! – Transformers
14. Robbie Robb – In Time (Futurecop! edit)

Euromix - Futurecop!

We Are The Future! Mix - Futurecop!

Dieter Dunkel et Wolfgang tous deux illustrateurs, fondent en 2005 un collectif d'artistes international "thezonders". La plupart de ces artistes, graphistes, illustrateurs, musiciens se sont rencontrés via Myspace.

Inspiré de jeux vidéo, cinéma, musique des années 80, le collectif the zonders travaille surtout sur des artworks de pochettes de disques tel que Minitel Rose, le clan Valérie, Crookers, Digitalism. " Notre passion est de créer une réflexion visuelle de la musique qu’on écoute ".

The zonders lance une ligne de Tee shirts aux sérigraphies TRONesque.

Aurélien

She responded to this post: http://chriskovac.wordpress.com/2008/09/11/chris-kovac-valerie-story

As previously stated, I wish Valerie Santiago only the best.

Thanks,

Chris Kovac

Valérie die mee liep met de modeshow van Miss Belgium Beauty kandidate Yoni Mous op Strictly Fashion, heeft enkele weken geleden geposeerd voor JHP!. Je kan nu een 10tal beelden van deze shoot bekijken op JHP!'s Flickrpage. Als locatie werd een prachtig loft in het centrum van Antwerpen gebruikt. Nogmaals dank dat we hier gebruik van mochten maken!

Been listening to this song on repeat for the past few days. In case you haven't guessed, I'm a huge Amy Winehouse fan (sans the addictions). Her voice is to die for and her musical style is spot on for me because I love jazz/soul/r&b.

Regardless of what happened, I still think Valerie Santiago is a good person with a good heart. I wish her only the best.

Chris Kovac

Denés, ihr Sohn kam aus seinem Zimmer angerannt. Er fragte seine Mutter, ob sie ihm ein Eis mitbringen könnte. Valerie schüttelte den Kopf und strich ihm sanft übers Gesicht. Nein, dazu reiche das Geld nicht mehr aus. Schmollend ging ihr Sohn wieder in sein Zimmer zurück.

Es war nicht immer leicht als allein erziehende Mutter eines siebenjährigen Jungen, zumal sie traurig war, dass sie ihm nicht soviel bieten konnte. Denés Vater hatte sie verlassen, als sie schwanger wurde. Das Leben war ziemlich hart zu Valerie. Sie versuchte so gut es ging, eine gute Mutter zu sein.

Doch die Traurigkeit holte sie öfters ein. Jack, war eine neue Bekanntschaft, in die sie ganz viel Hoffnung setzte. Valerie sehnte sich nach Liebe und hatte zum ersten Mal das Gefühl, dass es da jemanden gab, der es ernst mit ihr meinte.

Eine Mischung aus melancholischen und glücklichen Gedanken, lies sie trödeln. Bis sie ihren Mantel anzog, dauerte es eine Weile.

Draußen, hängte Valerie ihren MP3 Player um und schaltete ihr Lieblingslied auf eine Lautstärke, dass ihre Ohren fast vibrierten. Sie liebte es, wenn die Musik laut in ihr Ohr drang, so fühlte sie sich lebendig.

And I Think Of All the Things, What You're Doing, And in my Head I Paint a Picture.

Since I've Come Home, Well My Body's been a Mess, And I Miss Your ginger Hair, and the Way You like to Dress.

Oh Won’t You Come On Over, Stop Make A Fool Out Of Me, Why Don’t You Come
On Over,

Valerie.”

Amy Winehouses Lied “Valerie” gehörte zu ihren Lieblingssongs. Beschwingt ging Valerie den Hügel hinab. Bog an einem Haus ab und nahm die Abkürzung zur Hauptstraße. Leicht summend und beschwingt vom Song und der Vorfreude auf den heutigen Abend. Sie sah schon von weitem, dass die Ampel an der Kreuzung mal wieder ausgefallen war und ging mit schnellen Schritten auf die Kreuzung zu. Plötzlich kam ihr auf dem Fußweg ein rasender LKW entgegen, der einem PKW auswich. Valerie riss ihre Augen weit auf und ehe sie reagieren konnte, fühlte sie den Druck des Aufpralls in ihrer Brust und es wurde dunkel.

Kurze Zeit nach dem Unfall, waren die Rettungskräfte vor Ort. Der LKW-Fahrer stand unter Schock. Der Notarzt, der sofort ins Gebüsch lief und nach Valerie sah, konnte nur noch ihren Tod feststellen. Er bat die Sanitäter sie auf eine Trage zu legen und sie zuzudecken. Dabei bemerkte er ihren MP3 Player, der immer noch lief…

And I Think Of All the Things, What You're Doing, And in my Head I Paint a Picture.

Since I've Come Home, Well My Body's been a Mess, And I Miss Your ginger Hair, and the Way You like to Dress.

Oh Won’t You Come On Over, Stop Make A Fool Out Of Me, Why Don’t You Come
On Over,

Valerie.”

Nachtrag, auch wenn der Text eher traurig ist, ist das Lied von Amy Winehouse "Valerie" eher ein Gute Laune Lied, hier habe ich bei Youtube. de einen wirklich lustiges Video gefunden.

Foto: doatsch/pixelio.de

Except for maybe people my grandparents’ age, most everyone has heard of The Dark Knight, the sequel to Batman Begins and almost all of those people have seen it.

Because of such other popular movie characters as Spiderman, Hulk Hogan and Iron Man, superheroes are really, really popular, right now. Moviegoers really love seeing criminals get beaten up by people with supernatural or magical abilities and Batman is no exception. With his super human strength and ability to fly, Batman has come a long way from his humble beginnings.   

Batman started as a comic strip in 1939 (there was even an animated cartoon on television, in later years) and, although some kids enjoyed reading his adventures in the Sunday comics, he never reached the status of being really popular among most people. Not until Batman Begins, that is, when Christian Bale and a director brought Batman to the big screen. From then on, there was no stopping the Caped Crusades!

The Dark Knight actually starts off kind of cute with a group of clowns riding in a car. But, these clowns aren’t circus clowns, at all. They are bank robbers who are going to rob a bank of its money. There is a big shootout and only one clown is left: The Joker. Upset and alone because his friends are dead, The Joker leaves the scene of the crime in a bus.  

Meanwhile, Batman returns from Japan and begins to wonder if being Batman is even fun anymore. Crime makes him sad, so maybe he should just stop and move on to something else, he wonders. His ex-girlfriend Rachel Dawes (Maggie Gyllenhaal taking over for Tom Cruise’s wife Katie, which was weird because they totally look different, so it was hard to get past that because it is obviously a totally different person) is dating Harvey Dent, a lawyer. Harvey Dent is running for District Attorney, so Batman decides to let Harvey fight crime with lawsuits, instead.

Meanwhile, The Joker asks a group of bad guys to hire him to kill Batman. This starts a long series of explosions and people getting hurt because The Joker wants Batman to tell everyone who he really is. To make matters worse, The Joker tries to kill people that Batman likes like Detective Gordon and Harvey Dent. He succeeds in killing Maggie Gyllenhaal’s character Rachel *SPOILER* which makes Batman pretty sad because he loved her. An equally upset Harvey Dent gets so enraged by Maggie dying that his face actually catches on fire. What?! Anyway, so now Harvey Dent becomes a bad guy named Two Face *SPOILER* and decides to start killing people, too.  

Meanwhile, the whole town of Gotham is scared of The Joker, so they get on boats to leave, but The Joker has put bombs on the boats and waits with Batman for the bombs to go off. To his horror (and my joy!), the bombs don’t go off because the people in the boats don’t press the detonators to blow themselves up. *SPOILER* But, then, why would they, right? The Joker starts to fall off a building, but is saved by Batman. It is then he realizes that Batman is a good guy and that maybe they can be friends once he gets out of jail.

Meanwhile, Two Face tries to kill Detective Gordon’s family, but Batman uses his body of steel of stop the bullets. He and Two Face fall off that building and Two Face is knocked out cold. *SPOILER*

 Everyone is talking about how amazing Heath Ledger was and I will be no different. He was amazing. Whether you liked him or not, you have to admire the fact that any actor that finds out he’s dying and decides that his last role will be a bad guy is pretty brave. I found it sometimes hard to watch The Joker, like when he was hunching over and his mouth was dry (anyone who has taken medication knows about the dry mouth), because it was so obvious that Heath was really sick, but kept going and that is what a true actor does who is dedicated to his crafts.

The character of The Joker is incredibly scary, at times. I think the writers should have given him a name like The Exploder or The Terrorist because calling him The Joker suggests that he will be funnier than he really is. Just my two cents.

As scary as The Joker is, I kind of felt sorry for him. First, his dad got drunk and cut a smile into Joker’s mouth. *SPOILER* I don’t care what state you live in, that is still child abuse and totally wrong! Then, after his scars healed and he was an adult, his wife had plastic surgery and was worried about her scars, so Heath re-cut his mouth into a smile himself in order to show his wife that he loved her no matter what. *SPOILER* Kind of romantic, right? Apparently not enough for the wife because she decides to divorce him because he’s ugly! It’s no wonder that The Joker was so mean to people. All he had ever had his whole life were people being mean to him and, after a few years, that makes people turn their sadness into meanness. That’s just my two cents, though. 

Christian Bale was handsome, so I enjoyed his scenes. At first, I thought someone else was playing Batman because Christian Bale actually changes his voice when he’s in his Batman costume. Which leaves the audience to wonder: which voice is the real Batman? The Batman voice or the not Batman voice? It is little things like that, however subtle they may be to the average viewer, that add to the mystery of the character and the complexity of his dark past.

Hollywood is abuzz with the rumor that will even be a third Batman movie. If I had any say in it, I would say “OMG! Yes, Please!” After researching Batman, I was reminded that Batman had a sidekick named Robin. I know the movie hasn’t been cast yet, but I really think Christian Bale should consider Shia LeBeouf as Robin. Not only is he an amazing actor, but he would also appeal to a younger audience of people in their 20’s who might not relate as well with the other actors in the movie. Again, JMTC.  

I give The Dark Knight 5 out of 5 winks!     

NOTE: Do not read spoilers if you have not seen the movie, yet!

Anoraak usually goes with the Valerie sound-code (like opposed to dress-code.. you know!?!) and keeps his feet inside the 80's era but now decided to jump back a few years, and give away a mix covering the years of 74-79. You can read all about this on Valerie.

Here's the playlist:

Minnie Riperton - Adventures in paradise (1975)
Ohio Players - Skin tight (1974)
Sound Experience - JP walk (1974)
Chakachas - Jungle fever (1972)
Commodores - Rapid fire (1974)
The Brothers Johnson - Get the funk out ma face (1976)
Isaac Hayes - Pursuit of the pimpmobile (1974)
Mac Fadden & Whitehead - Ain't no stoppin' us now (1978)
Chic - Strike up the band (1977)
Cameo - Rigor mortis (1977)
Rick James - Sexy lady (1977)
KC & the Sunshine Band - Shake your booty (1976)

I'm too lazy to upload a 59,2 mb file, so you'll just have to go get the mix ->here<-

By Jan

[edit: Name is not based on any specific person or place.  A wise man said "only people that fall off really know where the line is"]

The First Meeting (the back story)

I met a person named Ms. Valerie back in late 2001 at a club in Kansas City, Missouri. I had some of these glowing LCD lights that ravers use to use to dance around with. She was a great dancer and we started to dance together and then we starting talking. After talking for a while, we seemed to have an instant connection, especially after she said she was studying advertising at the University of Kansas. Furthermore, she was an avid athlete, playing soccer and tennis. Finally, she was very beautiful. I thought I had quite the catch.

After a night of dancing and drinking, she came home with me. We made out for a while and ended up talking nearly all night. It is one thing to by physically attractive to someone, but I was very much attracted to her personality, strong spirit and charisma (energy). Again, I thought we had an instant bond and after getting cheated on with my last girlfriend.  I was happy to find a nice person. Never make assumptions.

We met out a few more times at some dance clubs and we had a great time and danced all night. It was more of the same; we would come home and make out and then talk nearly all night. We talked about philosophy, karma, life and other great things. She said she was returning to Mexico City to be with her family for a month or two and she would call me when she returned.

I was actually dating another person at the time, but we were not serious and we were not exclusive. She was a cute, nice woman, about 3 years older than me. I met her though a mutual friend. She kinda partied hard and that was a turn off. I had no thoughts of a long term relationship with this woman, and in retrospect it was probably a rebound relationship (those are always great, not).

Two months later

So, I had not heard from MS. Valerie for a while and she did indeed call me. I was very happy at the prospects of reconnecting. We went out several more times, but they were not really dates, or maybe they were. Frankly, I am not sure. We went to a Nelly Furtado concert and I thought we really bonded. She would make strange comments...Perhaps this was an indication of weirdness to come.

As we become somewhat closer (she has always been very guarded) I thought that maybe this is the person for me. Being good looking is nice, but I have also looked for a person that I can have a strong personal connection with. Around this time, my beloved Grandpa passed away. I actually went out with her the night before and went to the funeral tired and hung over. It was a very emotional time.

Then, whammo (the first whammo)

So, we seemed to be getting closer and I wanted to ask her to be my girlfriend, but for some reason, I never pulled the trigger. I was planning on getting her thoughts on the matter after out next big date. I was as excited as I had even been at the prospects of a long term relationship with someone.

So, we had planned to go to these DJs, Sasha and Digweed (two of the best Trance/House DJs in the world). I was super excited to dance, bond and become closer. So the concert is coming up and I have tried to call her and she is not returning my calls. Time goes by and immediately before the show, I get this email that she is stressed out over school and she did not want to go to the show. I was hurt, especially her waiting until the last minute and letting me know via a fucking email, and not even a call. This is foreshadowing events to come.

Time went by and I never heard back from her. No, calls or emails or nothing. That is the worst for me, not knowing one way or the other. It really makes you think in a negative, self-questioning way. [I learned not to let it effect me] I wrote her a letter and actually taped it on her door (there was no mailbox) and assumed that at least she would call and let me know what the hell happened. Nothing.

I ran into her at the club where we had met, but [sic] first seeing her “friend,” this insane girl named Lindsey. Lindsey actually drove off nearly running over Valerie at one point, crazy woman. So, I saw her friend and started to ask her what the hell happened to Valerie…Then I saw her. She was with two dudes and I said what the Fuck is going on? You could not at least call me back? I was hurt and pissed. If you do not want to see me, that is fine, but ignoring someone is the worst.

So, I had been drinking heavily and we got into this tremendous shouting match. [It was a loud club, so] I told her group to stay out of our conversation (unfortunately, I was not nice about it) and we argued near the entrance to the club. I remember vividly, the bouncer came up and told us to came down and we both turned our energy on him. It was quite something. We both left, her in one car, me in another. That was the last I was going to hear about this whole cluster-fuck. But, no. [Dammit]

I was deeply hurt for probably the next several months, questioning a lot of things. She actually called me a year or 18 months after I last saw her asking how I was doing. Keep in mind, I did not initiate contact. We said we should connect, but nothing ever happened and she moved out of Kansas City at some point.

5 years later

I had always kept my Lawrence, Kansas cell number hoping we would reconnect, to the dismay of my family who had to call me long distance every time. I had a girlfriend at the time who was more drama than I ever needed or wanted. Out of the blue, a soft, accented voice called my and it was Valerie. Oh, I was excited. Perhaps we were “meant to be” after all. Who initiates contact with someone after so long? She said she was thinking about me and the all night conversations that we had. This was in the summer of 2006; I had not see her since April 2002 (I remember, because I had bought my 1^st new car).

We talked on and off and she kept floating the idea of wanting to see me. I was still kinda involved with my ex-girlfriend (another story entirely). We would talk for a few months and she would disappear for a few months and then call me again. Flashing forward, we started to talk with more frequency. The issue of seeing each other again came up. I started to get excited.

In 2008, we were talking with more frequency both via the phone and text/MySpace. I said I would fly to see her (in Florida) and we could have a vacation together. I told her this way if something didn’t work out on the trip she could just drive back to her city, a few hours ago.
[deleted trump reference]

Things had not changed much for Valerie

In the 5 years since I had seen her, I thought she would have made something of herself as she seemed to be smart and talented. I thought she had a bright future; she still may but she is 28 and just floats around.  She has bounced around like 4-5 schools, studying whatever. She did the same with jobs (and even cities). She is a free spirit and just floated around. Not all that impressive if you ask me, when you are approaching 30 years old.
[I apologize for the generalizations and mentioning her previous bisexual relationships]

She played me like a fool

Long story short (there is even more back story) she was having problems with various roommates and she moved from Gainesville to Orlando to Tampa in like 6 months or less. All the while having no job; I guess her family supported her [edited snide comment]. Who knows, who cares?

She used me emotionally, she would call me and vent about all that was happening to her. I have my own issues to deal with and it is hard hearing all this negative energy being spewed at me. I let it go and tried not to let it impact me. She would never (or rarely) ask how I or my family was doing. And in fact, I had two sisters in the hospital and a number of other fun things going on. I got the feeling that I was being used, but I gave her the benefit of the doubt. This continued on, we talked a lot and it was all her telling me how these people were draining her energy and so forth.

I paid for a $300 plane ticket for her see me in August. I was so excited. My expectations were very high (I will never make that mistake again). We continued to talk 4-5+ times a week and I thought we were becoming more intimate. She continued to vent on me; I continued to offer her advice and support.

So, 4 days before she was going to come into town, I stopped hearing from her again. I felt crushed, feeling a sense of déjà vu. I allowed myself to be in the same situation as 5 years ago. How stupid (or naive) was I? Very much on both. SHE SENT ME A TEXT THE NIGHT BEFORE AND SAID HER ROOMATE PROBLEMS WOULD PREVENT HER FROM COMING INTO TOWN. Like a goddamn fool, I let it slide. I ate the ticket (it is non-refundable, non-transferable) and was left wondering. What kinda of a coward [person] does not even call someone, but hides behind fucking text.

So, like an Asshole…I buy another ticket

So, again, giving her the benefit of the down, I buy yet another ticket. She had to move and I offered to fly her to KC and she could hang with her friend. I was going to be out of town (on my ranch – that’s another blog) and she was going to stay with me for a week or so. I could not take off work for a week, so she was going to live in my condo while I was at work. I AM SO HAPPY THIS NEVER HAPPENED. Not to brag, but I keep significant poker money and how a lot of expensive art and what not. She could have walked out with about [ a bunch] in crap in one handful. How trusting was I? Glad I was not put to the test. I was prepared that if out meeting did not work out, I would offer to send her to an extended stay until she could fly back to Mexico City.

Here is the good part, I was playing the role of a goddamn travel agent, taxi service and banker for her. No thank you from her, that’s for sure. She only had the expectation that this is what she deserved. Wrong!

She did not even know my last name

This person who used me good, did not even know my last name, but yet she deserves all this pampering. Wow. No more needs to be said.  [she still uses Kobac? - hmm]

Break-up over a taxi tip

There was no relationship to begin with, so break-up is a misnomer. So, my sister has just wrecked her car and was in the hospital the night before. While I was ordering the taxi online, it asked for a tip. Partly as a test and partly because I wasn’t paying attention, I asked her if she could pick up the tip. I have no regrets, I always help take care of people and if $500 in plane tickets isn’t enough, then fine. [Said I would take her out to nice places] [This really did set me off, and I still do not understand...all this over a $3 tip]

I went to Colorado and called her about 4 times in 7 days and didn’t hear back from her. I sent her a text and asked if she was ok. She did respond, saying that she was disappointed that I asked her to tip and that it was rude and that no man would ever ask her to tip. Keep in mind, we had no fucking relationship…so whatever. If she wants to use me, I will not let her. I took the offensive and said I was disappointed that she could not even call me and talk to me. BUT SHE CAN STILL USE MY TICKET INTO KC TO SEE HER FRIEND. How much bullshit is that? She then said, via text, “things do not feel the same anymore…and proceeded to delete me from her MySpace page. How old are we, 15, or 28? Wow, this says it all.

I text her and said I will not play games and I will (foolishly) see her if she wants to meet up for coffee. I got so pissed, I did not know how to express my feelings to her. I was hurt (I don’t even care if she did not want to see me for what ever reason) and confused. Don’t most adults communicate instead of playing games? I guess not in this case. I did hit her with a “You are a terrible person, with bad energy and bad karma” blast via myspace and her phone. I somewhat regret that, but is absolutely true.  [I thought that would keep me away from her and she would not call me back]

What good comes from this (a lot)

[This was a placeholder for what I learned.  Turns out I learned a lot more than I bargained for]

This experience has thought me a lot about people and myself. I learned a long time ago that you can not control how people act. In the past, I would have been very upset and it would have negatively effected me in a lot of ways. I make the analogy to someone cutting you off in traffic. If you allow yourself to get pissed off, you are only hurting yourself. The person who cut you off is clueless to how you feel and would not even care anyway. This is the same scenario.

Being a poker player, I can also call this a bad beat. A bad beat is when you have a very good hand and you somehow loose the hand even though you had a 98% of winning. This makes people crazy and impacts their thinking; therefore they make bad decisions. Again, it only hurts me if I react badly. I have a lot of other insights that I will add to the post on how this made me a stronger person.

I will add a lot more to this section about what I learned, but I am still reflecting on the entire situation. I guess there are a lot of fish in the sea and next time I hope I catch a better tasting fist, not a poisonous [should I edit out poisonous; I was making an analogy and it does not mean a person is literally poison] one.

Whew! [The whew has worn off]

[Ok, so here is the afterstory.  I again apologize for using her name in the blog, I have since removed it.  I took down this blog, and after just reading it now, I still think it stands on its own merit.  This was a personal story (even though it is online) and I learned my lesson there.  I deleted this post, but I am reposting, because she fought back with a blog that was not true and did a great job and defamed me pretty good.  ]

P Christopher Kovac